The Doctor Is In

I served in Haiti

2010-05-24T12:56:00.006-05:00

From April 17-24 it was my pleasure to serve in Haiti with a great team of people:

It was great to serve with all of them, but I knew several from the team already, so it was a particular joy to serve with them -
Eli Roberts: I had been on a mission trip to Mexico with him, he had been in our community group, and I performed his wedding ceremony
Stuart Sullivan: This was our third mission trip together in 6 years. Dude is always up for cross-cultural missions
Bethany (Dr. Bart) Nagel: An RN that is also an all grown up version of a little JH girl that had been in my youth group when I was Pastoring in the suburbs of western Detroit from 1996-1998.
Phil Rhodes: My family's doc and a friend going back several years
Lindsay Sams: Her baby brother is on the some baseball and basketball teams as my oldest son
Sherri Barclay: Served at the same time as me briefly with "The Grove" around 7 years ago

The above picture was a fairly common site.

The next 7 posts are laid out sequentially to tell the story of our trip from my perspective.

HAITI Saturday, April 17 Day 1:

2010-04-17T23:55:00.003-05:00

Saturday, April 17 Day 1: We left NWA at 6am and connected to Dallas and then Miami. Particularly in Miami, I felt like it was the last chance at what we Americans consider “normal” food and restrooms for awhile.
We arrived in Port-Au-Prince, Haiti in the late afternoon, and the airport itself was full of security checks (i.e. men with guns). The building structure itself clearly suffered damage, so much of what we saw seemed temporary except for one gleaming (new?) hall we walked down to get to the shuttles taking us to customs.
As we were traveling with a great deal of extra weight (approx 140 lbs per person of mostly medical supplies and food), it was no easy task gathering our luggage from baggage claim. And that area was certainly temporary, as customs officials sat in newly built plywood boxes, and we could see the baggage handlers place the bags on the mini-conveyor belt.
By the time we finally got outside through security (pushing carts we rented full of our bags) we were like honey to flies in attracting locals wanting to get a buck off us. Many people nearby us brazenly said in broken English, “Give me a dollar.” Nothing else…just “give me a dollar.” It was bizarre.
However, what was even crazier were the “luggage helpers.” Many of them had official looking shirts…but in reality were scammers who wanted to shake you down for carrying your bags. It was not the safest feeling to be outnumbered 10:1 by people wanting to “help” you. The weird thing was, it seemed like it was completely legal if not semi-police sponsored. We would say “NO” loudly and repeatedly, and demonstrate that we didn’t want help, but that was not a deterrent. When you have 3 heavy bags per person (many outweighed some of our team members), there is not a whole lot you can do when surrounded by “helpers.”
It took about 15 minutes to get the 50 yards or so from the airport exit to our van/ & truck that were waiting nearby, and by the time we got to our vehicle we had 8-9 hangers on that would not leave (and 1 guy that actually HAD helped when a cart got stuck). We left a few tips to a few people who had actually helped a ton but made it clear we weren’t tipping everyone.

Driving through the city was tragic, beautiful, and compelling. There would be a nice building looking structurally sound, and next to it hundreds of tents with families living in them. We traveled through the shopping districts where traffic was as bad as anything I have ever seen in downtown Chicago on a Friday afternoon (HORRIBLE), and it was fascinating to see the things being sold on the sides of the street. Think of the numerous items that Wal-Mart sells, and then line the side of the road with it…and that sort of gives you an idea of how vast it was. Of course the selection was greatly diminished compared to a Wal-Mart, but there was/is a thriving market out of the ashes. And why not? People need clothes, and people need to eat. And oh were there people…everywhere there were people. Every now and then you would see someone taking a bucket bath or urinating in the street. They weren’t trying to be publicly indiscreet…it’s just Haiti. There were so many people and so much going on…you simply didn’t know where to look (or not look!) until it was too late.

We finally got to our house where we were staying for the week just before it started getting dark, and we instantly had an instant reverse culture shock. Our place was secure (behind walls with broken glass strategically placed on the tops along with razor wire), very clean, had running water for showers, and semi-flushable toilets (no TP allowed). It was also 2 stories tall, had a generator, electricity…and wifi. WOW. It was shockingly better than we anticipated, and though it seemed like a lot compared to many in the country, it was a blessing to have a bit of semi-normalcy to rest at that night and throughout the week. We had basic army cots to sleep on, but that too seemed like a luxury compared to what we had just driven through.
We gathered for a team time, sorted some Rx supplies, and hit the sack thoroughly exhausted late in the evening.

HAITI Sunday, April 18 Day 2

2010-04-16T10:18:00.000-05:00

Like most days in Haiti, we awoke early and made our own breakfasts. We hadn’t discovered the store that had opened nearby yet, so a lot of us had some sort of mixture of protein shakes, energy bars, or other items we had brought with us. Thankfully we were able to “ease” into the day though, as it was a Sunday morning and culturally people there (like most places) don’t do much. There are many churches there, but again…like in the U.S., not all of them are all that great in being beacons of Jesus, and instead are bogged down in religiosity.
Eventually we drove back through the madness of the city to a tent city located near a Bible church.
It was exciting and humbling to finally set-up our first makeshift mobile medical clinic. As soon as we were there we were SURROUNDED by children who wanted to touch and talk to us. Most of these fortunate kids still had a parent or two who had survived the quakes, but many didn’t own anything of value. One little boy saw that I had a soccer ball with me, and immediately began saying (sweetly, not aggressively), “You. You. Give me Ball-o?” He probably asked me this over 100 times. Throughout the clinic he was never far away from me, staring, begging, imploring…saying “You, You.” Meanwhile we served in our predetermined roles of triage, docs, Rx, and pastoral. My role was to repeatedly pray with/for anyone who desired it. My heart broke repeatedly as I heard stories of people who lost loved ones in the quakes. One guy shared that he lost 18 family members in one building, and only he and his little boy survived. Story after story…it’s was too much for my brain to process. In fact I never really asked for people’s stories because everyone had one, and I sensed that it wasn’t my role to ask about stories unless someone wanted to tell e. I did ask if I could pray with and for them…and if they had specific requests wanted to be lifted up with them too. It was a pleasure to sit with, hug, and pray for people that we were able to minister to by caring for them medically and spiritually. My heart was broken again and again for parents who were now homeless, often sick, and jobless. They don’t love their kids any less than I love mine. I hurt for them.

We eventually went back to the TNM house later that day before it started getting dark, and our team scurried to clean up for a needed good meal. Team time was a sweet mixture of worship, testimonies, and directions for the next day. Afterwards many of us stayed up late sorting pills for the next days clinic.

If I had to describe my place on the team, it would be “Papa Bear.” There is probably a better moniker because I’m not old enough or have enough gray hair to be a Papa…and Dr. Jeff may have fit this title as well as I…but the role I was playing seems to have somewhat fit.
As was my habit, I was the last to bed that and every other night we were in Haiti. My role in checking on everybody probably meant less sleep and definitely fewer showers in addition to praying with and for everyone…and just being “available” to lend my computer or process the days events in smaller groups. It also meant reminding people to hydrate themselves (we all forget) even when they didn’t feel like it, and to pass around the germX on a regular basis. In many ways my job was to stay out of the way while greasing the wheels of spiritual, emotional, and physical health and efficiency for the team. I LOVE that role. Occasionally I had to take the reigns and lead the team directly, but hopefully my teammates often didn’t even realize that I was serving them in the midst of serving the Haitian people. To me, the role I was serving in was the most enjoyable because it was an opportunity to attempt to do simple and humble Christ-like leadership. I’m not always good at being simple or humble, but I love the few and fleeting moments when I get it right. Only God and my teammates would know how well I did though.

Sleep finally came to late in the evening after some personal quiet time. And I slept hard.

HAITI Monday, April 19 Day 3

2010-04-15T10:27:00.000-05:00

This was a hard day, both physically and emotionally, as we spent it near the heart of Port-Au-Prince. After the normal morning routine we found ourselves in a tent city that sleeps approximately 50,000 people. Dirty. Dusty. Squalid. Children everywhere. Very heartbreaking.
To get water to these people, massive tanker trucks would come in and transfer fluids to large tanks, where people would line up near with their pitchers or used milk gallons. Meanwhile children would come up to us rubbing their belly’s, and saying in broken English, “Give me food. I’m hungry.” You would have to be a statue to not be moved by this horror, and many of us quietly fought back streaming tears as we ministered with our medical clinic.
Many children were malnourished, and there wasn’t a whole lot for them to do. Every inch of the area was taken up with people or tents or the few possessions people had.
We worked for several hours, and towards the end as we were packing up, a trauma case came in: A child had been bitten( aka chewed!) near the base of his ear in a fight with different child. Our team was AWESOME, as we rallied around to hold him down, push back the crowd, and medically address his issue like an ER right there on the spot. This was another moment that I was proud to be serving with our team, because everyone stepped up to make sure this kid got taken care of, and prayed for. It was definitely a “moment” that stood out in the midst of many others.

HAITI Tuesday, April 20 Day 4

2010-04-11T10:44:00.000-05:00

We got an early start as we had to drive 2+ hours out of of PAP to a small village that had an orphanage. Not too far into the drive, I switched out of the main van and joined a bunch of the translators in the back of a little truck. This was a fortuitous blessing…I spent the next 90+ minutes really seeing and smelling the city and countryside of that part of Haiti. The translators and I started talking music and sports. At one stop I hopped out of the truck and ran and grabbed something from the main van, and quickly went back to the truck. My translator buddy looked at me kind of wide eyed and said, “I can tell, you are a player!”
This took me aback, because I’ve most often heard that term used as a slang for a womanizer, so I quickly protested this label and started explaining that I’m a 1 woman man. It took us a minute of conversation to realize that what he said/meant was very different from what I heard/understood. He was using the term “player” as a compliment, and explained that when I had ran my little errand, I had moved with strength and fluidity that matched what a good soccer player would have. So essentially…he was saying I’m athletic. We had a good laugh once we figured out what was lost in translation, and it was kind of a 2nd level ice breaker that got us talking about all sorts of stuff even more.
While I was talking with the translators, they were surprised that I knew Fugees/Wycliff/LaurynHill music. All of a sudden we were singing “Killing Me Softly” together, in the back of a truck flying through the beauty and destruction of northern PAP…and it started pouring rain so fast we cold barely keep our eyes open. Such a cool “moment” that lasted quite awhile. The rain eventually stopped, but the translators and I had bonded and were really enjoyed the ride. Again and again Haitian people on the sides of the road would see me (the only Caucasian in the back of the truck with 5-6 black guys), point, wave, and yell
“Hey Blonde!” Note: In Haiti, “blonde” doesn’t mean yellow haired person, it means white person. It is far closer to a term of endearment and is not really something meant as negative/racist.
We eventually reached a medical clinic and orphanage where people had been lined up SINCE THE NIGHT BEFORE awaiting our doctors arrival. It was humbling to see these beautiful people who were desperate for our help. The orphanage had approximately 30 infants and young toddlers…and the main clinic had lines of adults who had walked (some hours) in from the mountainous countryside to be seen. I’ve been in some remote locations, but this was WAY out there…and it was just the beginning of civilization to many of the folks we saw. True villagers in huts and small houses sitting by a river…in some ways it was almost idyllic, but it would also be a difficult place to eke out a living.
We served most of the day at this location, and were humbled and quite exhausted when we eventually got in the trucks to backtrack the arduous journey back into and through Port-Au-Prince.

HAITI Wednesday, April 21 Day 5:

2010-04-10T14:14:00.001-05:00

We visited 2 orphanages this day, including one where several other NWA area docs had spent some time the month before. So there was planned follow-up to do. However, the orphage that stands out most in my mind was built into the side of a mountain, and there was a horribly large empty pit in the back of it. It would be too easy for a child to fall into it. The bathrooms were indescribably dark and disgusting, and it was a tough place to visit.
As we walked in, we had children almost immediately plaster themselves to us giving and wanting hugs. Some kids wouldn’t let go. We brought multiple toys and balls to hand out, and they were hungrily snatched up and played with immediately.
One particular 8 year old girl named “Lovely,” (pronounced “lo-vah-lee”) snuck up behind me while I was sitting down playing catch with some boys. I realized after a few minutes that she had started a slow process of leaning into my back and laying her head on my shoulder. It was very sad and charming at the same time. I reached around and put my arm around her shoulder and gave her a real good side hug…and it was like she melted into my arm. She barely left me for the rest of the time we were there. The one time she did was when she jumped up and ran to a translator to speak for a second. She came back soon after and said in broken English, “I love you. I want to go home with you.” My heart broke. I don’t know if I’ve recovered from this even yet. I love my children very much and missed them while in Haiti. But it was an honor to be father-like to this orphan girl, even for a brief time.
Later in the day we returned to a location we had visited earlier in the week, and worked to salvage various medical supplies from a pharmacy that had been ransacked post-earthquake. This was also nearby the boy we had given the soccer ball to on Sunday, as well as some other children we had given medical care too. They were very willing helpers in carrying the supplies we were able to recover, and I also spent 30 minutes with them doing little visual tricks which led into telling them about Jesus. One picture here is of how/where they got their water after walking 200 yards down a steep hill.
This was another day that made us pretty tired emotionally, yet we were energetic about afterwards.

HAITI Thursday, April 22 Day 6:

2010-04-09T14:45:00.000-05:00

We finally took a needed break and had a slow morning. We slept in except for a precious few that went out and found us some fresh pastries. Where they got these amazing breakfast treats is beyond me, but it was a special treat. The food was a cross between a buttery croissant and a lightly sugar covered dutch-letter pastry…something like I’ve only ever had in Pella, Iowa. It was good to ease into this day, because it ended up being VERY long.
A little before lunch we went up the mountain a bit and looked over PAP from a great viewpoint. There were many painters and other art/craft items for sale, and we spent about an hour making purchases and just taking it all in. I was definitely the guy most interested in doing the barter experience, so a few of the team members brought me in to haggle when they found something they wanted. I’m weird…I love the give and take of shopping like this! I’m confident that we overpaid a bit (on purpose), but not to the extent the sellers were exorbitantly going for! It was fun to me because I knew that their material costs were less than $1, the average daily wage in that area was $2, and most of the items for sale were probably only worth $2-$3 in the U.S. So when they were asking $80 for something…the haggling game was on! It got to the point where the shopkeepers would see me coming and say, “No! I’m selling to her not you!” It was thoroughly entertaining for all of us.
Later in the day we were extremely blessed to be invited to participate in an evangelistic outreach in a smaller yet fairly secure tent city. A missionary in the area had shot a French/Haitian “prodigal son” type movie before the earthquake, and was using it as an outreach tool to share the Gospel. Initially our team was able to meet with a Pastor whose congregation was building a church building right next to where the tent city was (they had started before the earthquake too), and we prayed with and for him to be able to reap much fruit and to disciple people who had been displaced to the doorstep of their church.

We then walked around and through the tent city praying with and for people for about and hour as it was getting dark, and then the movie came on. AWESOME response. People came streaming forward to give their lives to Jesus after the movie, including a bunch of children. I must have had some sort of little spirit made sign on my head that only kids could see or something, because over 15 kids came straight at and surrounded me. I sat in the dirt with them, and helped lead them in asking God personally into their hearts. I also was able to pray with a couple of men who became Christians, and even one of our translators rededicated his life to Christ. Wow…just wow. What an evening. I praise God for his goodness in allowing me to be a part.
Again…by the time we got back to our living quarters late that night we were excited, tired, and in awe of how God was using us.

HAITI Friday, April 23 Day 7:

2010-04-08T14:49:00.000-05:00

We did another medical clinic day at a differnt orphanage, and probably saw 200+ kids. This was actually a fairly well run orphanage, but still…200 kids and limited adults is pretty rough.
One boy that stood out in my mind wan named Jean. He’s 12 years old and loves baseball. Note that my oldest son is named John, is 12, and most definitely is into baseball. Jean actually spoke some English, and gave me a tour of the 4 story building that has survived the quake. All of the children in there sleep in little 2 ½ foot by 3 ½ beds that are stacked 3 high…and again, this was a GOOD orphanage comparatively. Once again my heart was broken for orphans. We basically did medical stuff and played with them most of the day.
Later, I remember being very ready to see my family again. I remember going through my personal possessions to find what I could leave in country, and making sure everyone had their passports and were preparing to travel. I remember worshipping with the team. But honestly…the week was FULL of signifianct moments and it’s hard to remember it all.

HAITI Saturday, April 24 Day 8:

2010-04-07T14:55:00.000-05:00

Going Home.

We were up early as there were 4 levels of security and more baggage people wanting for us at the airport. After checking in we sat around for quite awhile waiting for our flight. While we were getting on one of our teammates was sitting off to the side. She had shown the ticket taker the wrong ticket, and he had waived her to the side...and she had assumed he would let her on later. Fortunately I called her back over and made him recheck…he had had no plans to let her on! Good thing I was still awake! But after finding the right ticket she joined the rest of the team, and all was well.
Once we arrived in the U.S., I remember getting fresh yummy food in the airport. But I mainly remember finally seeing my beautiful Marque once landing in Arkansas…and going home to my kids. They were shocked to see me with a mustache (the one and only of my entire life).
I can’t easily summarize this experience as a whole…but I know this: I was blessed beyond measure to serve the needy of our world. For 1 week my body and mind was able to do what my heart longed to do since hearing of the tragedy. It was hard, yet totally worth it. I could not have done it without the support of my wife, kids, and church…and because I have those things I am more than doubly blessed. I thank God continually.

We Won A Trip

2009-09-26T12:35:00.003-05:00

REALLY?

It appears as if it for real. Though they haven't updated their official twitter feed yet, or put my name on the Winners List… I think that it is only because it is the weekend. I was in contact with them until 5pm Hawaii time last night. I sent an additiional simple follow-up question after writing back and forth a couple times a few minutes later, and they have yet to respond...so I'm guessing the travel/trip/prize office is closed for the weekend. Enough other communication had occured beforehand though that I'm feeling pretty confident that it isn't a scam.

HOW?

I entered through this: http://www.marriotthawaiitweets.com/

They are giving a total of 25 trips away, including 3 trips away a week, one on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday through Mid-October. In order to qualify you have to follow their twitter feed, and sign-up weekly to let them “tweet” in your name once each time.

After they pick a winner, the person has 48 hours to respond to the official email. Meanwhile Marriot dumps all of the other entries. Apparently they have tried to give away the Week 10 trip a several times so far, but none of the winners have responded in time! Meanwhile they have given away 3-5 other trips...but the trip #10 couldn't seem to find a permanent winner.

So on yesterday, Friday afternoon 9/25/09, they tweeted that they were going to have to do another attempt at giving away that particular prize. I remembered that they had dumped all previous entries, so I figured my odds were higher than normal if I re-entered, as it was the end of the week and fewer people than normal would have the chance to enter. As I run a small-non-profit, I don't even have an office. However... I do have an constantly use my iPhone...and this little tool helped me win!!!

I got the official email and direct message tweet later the same night about 7:30pm saying I was a winner if I would respond within 48 hours. It also included an official affidavit for me to sign and send back, saying I am who I say I am and we agree to do the trip before Dec. 20th or forfeit it.

I was driving down the road at the time, but an hour and half later I was able to respond officially with the affidavit signed and scanned, and they replied congrats. We wrote back and forth a couple times before I think their offices closed.

WHAT DID WE WIN?

◦ Coach roundtrip for two via Hawaiian Airlines from aWest Coast city

◦ Five consecutive nights of accommodations at Wailea Beach Marriott Resort & Spa. LOOK AT THESE PICS!

◦ Six-day Hertz rental of a full-size car

◦ $100/day resort dining credit

◦ A variety of Island activities

WHEN ARE WE GOING?

We don’t know. My sister is getting married in Chicago in early November, and traveling is pretty tough on Marque's health, so she will need a break before/after that trip and doing this. Plus we need to find affordable airfare to get us to a West Coast city. We will probably shoot for mid-october (less likely) or late Nov or early Dec.

READ THIS PART!!!

I have been praying for over a year for God to provide some way to get Marque out of the Midwest on a “just us” trip, but finances have not made this possible. Our circumstances are pretty challenging too, as we live off partial support, and we have 6 mouths to feed.

Every time I started saving $ for a trip…something important came up that seemed too selfish to not use the cash for.

We celebrated our 15 year anniversary this past summer, but still haven’t been able to travel alone, unless you count getting her another MRI in Little Rock.

A huge desire of my heart has been to get Marque to somewhere warm and tropical. Her health has been so spotty over the past couple years…and the deluge of rain we have had so far in September has given her more migraines than normal lately.

As recently as last week I was still trying to figure out a way to get her somewhere on vacation where there is sun, sand, and no kids...but everything was too expensive. But hey...God had something else in mind...and I'm floored.

THIS IS A HUGE GIFT FROM GOD. WE ARE SO THANKFUL!!!

My bike rider

2009-05-30T23:13:00.003-05:00

This May has been very special. Macye has earnestly sought me out regularly for a bike ride. She got her training wheels off a couple weeks ago, but more recently decided that it's time to ride and practice. Yesterday we rode over 2 miles together on Rogers Bicycle trail. She is getting really good!
Also she did a very good job in her school musical (she was probably the loudest and did all the moves in time with flair), and was gorgous in her big ballet recital. I love having a daughter....and Macye's personality is a joy. I love my girl!

Approaching Mid-life

2009-05-30T22:26:00.003-05:00

I'm entering into a different season of life. I can sense it in so many ways. My oldest boy is about to enter middle school in the fall. We've actually lived in the same city for 6 years and don't intend to move soon (after a decidedly roaming existence during our first 9 years of marriage). I'm closer to 40 than 30, and love it...despite my knees not agreeing with my brain on whether I can still dunk a basketball or not. And my little Payton...ain't so little anymore. He's 5. He's big and bulky. And he is going to full-day Kindergarten in the fall. Yep...our last one to got to full-day school. Times are achangin'.
A new big season for me is that of peace in ministry. I love Youth Ministry. Always have. But never really imagined myself staying in it in this way, much less being thrilled to do it. I actually want to write and teach more, though I don't have the time to those things AND effectively do the things that I'm doing well with Exago currently. So if I'm really supposed to pursue those things, God's gonna need to show me a plan and/or open some doors. Not that Exago has arrived as a perfect thing...but it has reached such a good rhythm of growth and credibility. There is so much more I want to do, but it's nice to be able to see how this has grown from an impassioned idea God planted in my head, into something that legitimately ministers to leaders who are trying to survive. I got a few meaningful text messages and voice mails this week alone, from guys needing the ministry we provide. When I was talking with one of them later on, I let him know how important he is in helping kids find Jesus, and that I appreciate him being on the front lines of youth ministry. I could almost hear the tears in his eyes. He said, "You know...your the only one who thanks me." Yeah...I know. I've been there. It's tough. It's why we exist as a ministry. It's a passion I have.
Another full-circle is the oncoming train of boys and girls. John has suddenly turned into "Mr. It" in the eyes of some little 5th grade girls. These aggressive females call, email, and show up in our front yard trying to hang out with him. Let's just say we haven't dealt with this issue on this side of the equation before...but a plan is being formulated! And I can see it now when some poor twirp shows up on my door-step asking for my daughter. God help that child and hide my guns.
A weird thing for me is men...er....boys who go through mid-life crisis. I don't get it. My brother-in-law has completely flipped out. And I've known a couple others over the years that went buck stupid upon turning 40. Now I realize I only turn 37 this year, and I'm not immune to the effects of sin. However, why someone would turn their back on their wife or kids is just COMPLETELY beyond me. I love Marque and my kids more and more all the time. None of us are perfect, but I think life gets sweeter the longer we are together. I actually have an incredibly strong sense of blessing that my wife is even still alive. I just can't imagine turning my back on them, buying a sports car, and moving out. But I knew someone who pulled that crap. So I'm praying that God will protect me from going insane like that, and that instead I will be a man who has a family to love on and to be loved by for many years to come.
On a much lighter note, I really like baseball. Always have. My boys are all so good at it too. It's so fun to watch them work hard and have their own losses, victories, and all-around good lessons learned from that game. My Dad gave us a batting cage/machine/net he found used about a year and a 1/2 ago for Christmas. We all love it...but especially me. I love going out and tossing balls to our boys. I love seeing their smiles when they really smash a hard-liner that they know would go the distance if out on a real ball field. And to be able to do that in my own backyard? Simply wonderful. I told Marque when we met that I wanted 3 boys and a girl and a batting cage with a pitching machine. I have no idea how I knew that so specifically way back in 1992...but apparently I meant it. And Macye is perfect...because she has no use for baseball at all...so it keeps these boys a little balanced while enduring her ballet and her pink everything. We have more fun in our house!
Life isn't going to slow down. But it's interesting to see how it changing. I pray that God will really capture my kids hearts for Him in ways I can't even show them over these next few precious years I have left with them.

Back in the Day

2009-02-04T15:18:00.002-06:00

A former youth group guy name Adam (that I youth pastored in the mid/late 90's) wrote this on his Facebook. I'm referenced in it, and on the whole I thought it was good despite that fact. :)

a driveway, a basketball hoop, and many memories

by Adam Joseph Seguin (notes) Tuesday, June 24, 2008 at 8:29am

The driveway was once home for a boy to play basketball. Whenever the boy felt upset or sad or happy, the touch of the basketball against his hands and the sound of the ball hitting the pavement made everything seem alright. Now that boy is older and the driveway is still there, but the basketball hoop is not quite the same.

The rim is just hanging down on a 45 degree angle and it’s a surprise that it has not broken off. Also the height of the hoop can no longer be adjusted; it just stays at astounding six and a half feet. With the hoop on the break of destruction, he still goes out there and tries to shoot some hoops. It’s no where near the same, but he just like dribbling the ball and reacting the famous moments in basketball history.

At times he goes through withdrawals of playing basketball in the driveway and the excitement of making a 20 foot jumper nothing but net. He misses the sweat dripping down his face, by playing basketball games with his buddies for hours in the heat of the burning sun. Especially the times on an idle Friday night after the usual pizza dinner, when there seems like nothing to do, shooting jump shots in driveway would always seem like an “Einstein like” idea.

That driveway and that hoop provided a lot of cherished memories for the boy who now in his early twenties. He remembers the days practicing dribbling the ball in between and around his legs. The first time perfecting the cross over, around the back, between the legs, and all other dribbles the basketball players keep in their back pocket for any moment to beat their opponent in a game.
On that very driveway the little boy taught himself how to make a left handed lay-up. That took a 100 percent effort on his part, because he is right hand is his strong hand. He also taught himself how to shoot left handed as well, but his left handed shots are no where near as good as his right handed. This boy is a pure jump shooter and there was a moment in that driveway that could prove it to be true. It was one Friday night when this boy was around the age of 13, with God as he witness, made 119 consecutive 17 ft jump shots. He doesn’t accept anyone to believe him, but he knows it’s true.

Around that same age this boy made a huge upset that was one for the record books. His youth pastor at that time stop by his house to hang out. His youth pastor was young man, in his late twenties, with some athletic abilities and he like playing basketball too. The boy beat his youth pastor 18-17. For his youth pastor sake, the actual score was 6-17; the boy’s baskets count as three points and the pastor’s baskets counted as 1.

These are the memories the young man misses and longs to make more. The young man has been talking to his dad about buying a new hoop and it’s looking good that it will happen. So he can’t wait to get back out there and shoot hoops in that famous driveway.

25 Random Things About Me

2009-01-28T20:06:00.000-06:00

1. I love Jesus. Really. And on a huge sidenote: that whole making disciples thing…yeah He meant that. But have you ever sat down and researched a good working Biblical Definition of a Disciple? I think we would have more actual disciples if people/churches actually defined what that looks like without strict legalism, and began to seek that instead of their current programming.

2. I love my wife, and then our 4 kids, in that order. Marque is wonderful, and my kids are amazing. I REALLY had/have a great family I grew up in too.

3. A huge focus of mine in High School was to become a good enough basketball player to play in college, to the point that it was not a real healthy obsession. Once I was at college I had very successful tryout (went 7-9 from the 3 point line and torched the school’s starting PG)…but then I didn’t accept the offer to be "a walk-on for the first year, and partial scholarship the 2nd year." I turned it down partially because I was offended they didn’t offer me an immediate scholarship (though they did to an obviously less-athletic kid who was 7 inches taller than me), yet the MAIN reason was because I was also being offered a job as a Youth Director at a church. One of the toughest decisions I ever made.

4. I have to be warmed up, but I can still barely dunk a basketball on a legit goal. But my legs are fading fast…I’m 5”11 and 36 years old so my goal of dunking on my 40th birthday is looking less logical.

5. I’m not scared of the things that most people freak out about. I have NO fear of public speaking. Last year I surfed off the coast of South Africa in an area known for random shark attacks. I’m not sure if this is because I love life, or have the “eternal security” thing so down pat that I’m not scared of dying. Or maybe I’m just stupid. I am scared of NOT living my life to it’s fullest though.

4. My higher education degrees and primary focal point over my career have been in Youth Ministry. I still love it.

5. We moved from Chicago back to Arkansas in 2003 because of God’s urging to go and serve at Restoration Village temporarily, and because we were sensing that God was telling us that he was going to “show us what was next.” We LOVED Chicago, but it seemed like that was one of those non-negotiable things God was telling us to do. Not long after the move I was invited to help plant a church and separate was asked to be an Adjunct Professor teaching ministry at JBU…both of which were God things that prepared me a TON for starting Exago.

6. I am a licensed Private Investigator in Iowa, Kansas, Missouri, and shortly will be in Arkansas too. My Dad taught me well, and it’s a great side-job that keeps food on the table even though my main time and passions center around ministry to youth leaders. I work on Surveillance related cases approximately 3 days per month.

7. I want to pull all my kids out of school and move the family overseas for a year on a short term sabbatical/missions experience. Cape Town is my first choice, but this can’t/won’t happen unless we sense God’s peace about the timing of it all in relation to my normal ministry.

8. I have a Seminary degree already, but then was invited to do my Ph.D. in Leadership a couple years ago. I turned down that amazing opportunity because I DIDN’T have God’s peace. Not long later, Marque started getting ridiculously sick…and I understood better. Very thankful I’m not in that program or I would have been terribly distracted and failed at either it or at loving my family. Whew!

9. Perfect meal: Gino’s East Sausage Pizza with Mt. Dew, French Silk pie with milk.

10. On the DISC personality scale, I’m a High D and a High I. Therefore I apologize in advance for when I offend you. It’s not a matter of IF, it’s when…and I really am sorry. Really.

11. It fascinates me how wonderful Marque is, as we really are wired differently. Marrying her was the best decision of my life (other than following Jesus).

12. I’m told that my grandfather used to go to meetings in the same building where Jimmy Hoffa held his Teamsters get togethers, though we aren’t sure how involved Grandpa was or wasnt. Meanwhile his older brother was somewhat involved with Al Capone as a possible leg-breaker. I’ve never done the research to connect or directly confirm all of this, but I really don’t doubt it. There is more to this family history stuff that is not appropriate to share here.

13. I really really liked a rough movie called “A History of Violence.” It’s not for the faint of heart, so don’t run out and rent it. I connected with it because the primary character is capable of SO MUCH sin, but he chose a better life. As a Christian I feel that with my sin nature, I’m not that different from him (minus the killing/maiming/etc). Most people though DO NOT GET that connection, and are very unhappy with me for recommending this movie. You’ve been warned.

14. I still don’t need a lot of sleep, though more then when I was young. 6 1/4 hours a night on a good routine is perfect. If I get 8 hours more then a few nights in a row, I start to get headaches. I like video games, so late night Xbox is a great chill time in leiu of sleep.

15. I love watching my boys play sports, and get a kick out of their athletic accomplishments. They are both pretty good studs at all they do (Marque was a great athlete growing up), so I push them if THEY decide they want to commit to getting better at something

16. I started the para-church ministry I work for, but I still believe that the local church is the hope of the world in being Jesus.

17. I am equally disturbed by the right’s vilification and the left’s idolization of President Obama. He is neither the messiah nor the anti-Christ. Now leave it alone and see how it plays out. (totally stole that from my sister).

18. For the first time in my life I am anti-capital punishment (something I gave pro speeches on in college) and anti-torture. Not sure how this gels with how much I love Jack Bauer on 24, because the character seems to make choices I agree with as well.

16. I’m a terrible cook. Again, again…thank God for my awesome wife or we might all starve or spend too much time at McDonalds.

17. Having a daughter mixed in with 3 boys was an incredible blessing. Nice to have her delicateness, though she has a STRONG take no crap personality while wearing her pink and drawing her pictures.

18. My best friends with only 1 exception are or have been in full-time ministry of various degrees. Particularly Worship related.

19. I didn’t like most of the people I knew who were in full-time ministry when I was growing up, because they seemed judgemental and unapproachable. They usually were "above" me, even though I loved Jesus and could have used more encouragement.

20. I have an unhealthy obsession with all things Chicago, especially the sports.

21. I root for the White Sox and the Cubs. Go ahead, bring it…I can take it. In a World Series though I would ALWAYS choose the Sox.

22. My office is a new macbook and my iPhone…and wherever I am. Simple, elegant, efficient. Yes, it’s good.

23. Given the opportunity to live anywhere with my family (without regard to price or to current ministry calling), I would be torn between something tropical and a large condo off Lake Michigan in Downtown Chicago. I love the people and culture of Chicago. It’s…just…me.

24. I’m allergic to Chicken. Yes, it totally blows…and so do I if I consume some. Yes, I’m sure. Yes, even soup. No, not eggs. Chicken. My stomach refuses to accept it, I might as well eat aluminum.

25. I don’t mind losing, but I WILL compete with passion. Therefore I am a very competitive person, but really don’t care if I (or my kids) lose at something as long as HUSTLE and ATTITUDE are done right. It kind of freaks people out that I can be so passionate and disconnected about the final outcome at the same time. In the here and now it’s nice to compete so do your best, but in the eternal big picture…it’s just a game.

Ramblings about a couple of winners that I get to call "son"

2009-01-10T18:47:00.007-06:00

Last Fall John and Reagan transitioned to public school. John is in 5th and Reagan is in 4th. I am truly amazed at how well they have done. Here is a short list at SOME of the things that have gone very well on top of good grades:

Both boys have won multiple awards for "Reader of the Month," and other things like that. With those awards come gift-certificates to local restuarants and a certificate of accomplishment...which makes it really fun. Seems like we get to go out every few weeks because of them!
Both boys finished in the top fastest 1 milers in races at school, and got to represent their school in a city-wide cross -country race featuring the Top 5 from each school (I think there are like 14 total elementary schools). Reagan finished in the top 10 in the main race, and John WON the main race, so together they helped their school (Reagan Elementary) win the race in total points.
A couple weeks ago, there was an in-school spelling bee featuring the Top Spellers in grades 4 and 5. Both boys made it to the finals...and then they placed 1st and 2nd overall! As a result, Reagan represents the school in the county-wide spelling bee, and John is the 1st alternate should Reagan be sick! When Reagan beat John...I was humbled and most proud of how John cheered and encouraged Reagan instead of being jealous. I will never get that picture out of my mind. Tears in my eyes as I remember it even now.
Today Reagan won the city-wide free throw competition sponsored by the Elks Club. He had to beat all the other 8-9 year old boys in his school to go up against 13 others from other schools. John took 2nd in his age group (10-11s) at school, so he didn't get to compete at the city-wide competition (which was kind of surprising because he is a very good shooter), but he was still excited for Reagan. Now Reagan is supposed to go to "State" in Hot Springs to go up against the other best Free-Throw shooters! They will even give us $50 to offset our gas if we will take him there!

Needless to say...it has been a whirlwind of activity and success. On one hand I want to encourage them to do their best still, but on the other hand I don't want them to think that life will always be as easy and victorious as the past 4 months. Meanwhile I've also been glad that they have not been prideful or jerks about all this winning as far as I can tell. They seem like genuinely good kids, despite their sometimes mouthy father.

This is all great, and fun...yadda yadda yadda. But what I REALLY TRULY REALY TRULY REALLY TRULY want for them is to love and glorify God with all of their hearts and minds. Sometimes I wonder if I talk about that enough, or whether I actually talk about it too much. Hopefully I model it and not just talk about it...because I'm convinced that loving God and contemplating God's love are a couple of the main challenges and primary focal points in life.

One of the ways I OFTEN try and underline this is in my attempts in talking about our love before a big competition of some sort. I look them in the eye and say, "Hey. I love you as much as I possibly can right now. After this thing is over, I won't love you less if you lose. And I won't love you more if you win. I don't love you because of this stuff. I love you because you are my son, and I'm proud of you regardless of what happens here today." I think that it has sunk in that I really mean this, but I keep saying it because I never want them to think that I love them any less if they go through periods in life where there are more losses than wins. And I want them to get that God's love works like this too, though on a far more unfathomable and wonderful level.

Currently though...wins are often the norm. I'm not overstating it at all in saying that our family trophy count has overwhelmed our places to put them on or around their desks. It's a high water mark time for winning and success around here. I hope though that what I'm mostly developing are young men who will love God. I've been thinking a lot about the following verse....so it is where I will end this update:

Titus 2:6-8 (English Standard Version)...urge the younger men to be self-controlled. 7 Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, 8 and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.

Post-Election Prayers...and Racism

2008-11-18T08:55:00.003-06:00

Posted much of the following comment area on a friends blog earlier today, and decided to pull it over here and elaborate too. It's not brilliant, but it's a good random summary of my sense of some things race related. By no means is it an exhaustive commentary, because it doesn't fully address the topic. But from where I stand in my tiny corner of the world, it's how I often see things.

I actually felt a bit Switzerland-like in this recent Presidential election. Both primary candidates had obvious (to me) strengths and weaknesses, thus I didn't make my final decision for whom I would vote for until the final days leading up to the vote. I am both excited and a bit skeptical of Obama's new station (he is not Christ after all, despite the adulation some have heaped on him), but I will happily be praying for the man and his family, his staff, and his decisions. Some great things could happen in his Presidency, despite or perhaps because of the challenges we face as a nation. It would be failure to not give him a fair shake or our prayers as individuals and as a nation. Even if you didn't vote for him, you have to hope and pray that he succeeds in helping our nation prosper while not ignoring the plight of the poor or leading us towards intrusive government. Tough job!

That being said, I was actually pretty offended how quickly the news (we just happened to turn on NBC) turned the win into a race issue. I'm not an expert, nor am I surrounded by racism daily (or even often)...but why did they have to go there? My understanding is that CNN soft-peddeled the idea that Obama didn't win the South probably because of race (going so far as to refer to the South as the old confederate states)!? Why was it not more "here is a guy whose fresh ideas are inspiring people," instead of more "here is a guy who is black!" ? I was disgusted at the coverage because I really don't care what color he is...nor that he happened to be technically representing a particular voting party. He won. Celebrate that, and leave it at that!

I had an older caucasian relative that (when he was alive) was overtly racist. I often avoided him, partially because of this. He would root for a particular ball team, but then call a player a derogatory racist name if he committed an error. It was sad, and ignorant of him. He had already passed away by the time I was old enough to have the understanding and gall to explain to him that Jesus probably wasn't a blue-eyed gentlemen of European descent.

One semester of college I attended a campus where I was obviously a minority when compared to the skin tone of my peers, and there were a few ignorant racists among those peers that thought it was appropriate to label me as "whitey" or "honkey" too. Of course I would have been in danger had I pointed out the derogatory nicknames for their race, but I digress.

Though I've been able to dunk a basketball for most of my life, and have always been a very fast runner...people of different races have inquired as to whether I am truly caucasian (innuendo being that only people with dark skin should have actual athletic abilities). Sometimes I knew they were joking. Sometimes...not. Crazy? YES. But even still, my sense is that in this day and age in the U.S.....ignorant and/or racist people are the minority. Perhaps not internationally as much, but again, I'm speaking primarily of the U.S.

I no longer know anyone overtly racist. Thus, I've had this type of discussion more than a couple of times with a close friend of mine who is not caucasian. He was raised in Brooklyn and has lived in the South too. We both reached the conclusion that NOT ALWAYS, but far too often....race is an issue primarily because people make it an issue, even when it obviously isn't. Yet somehow even that line of logic is attacked by those who would accuse us of sugar coating everything in our racism. Seems like lose-lose sometimes, no matter the intention of your heart and mind. It's almost like it's not politically correct to be a complete non-racist. Our media/culture seems to tacitly teach a gospel of structured racism. I can't stand it.

An important caveat in this, is my strong stand that ALL of life is about God, and Jesus died for people regardless of their race. See Revelation 5:9 And they sang a new song: "You are worthy to take the scroll and to open its seals, because you were slain, and with your blood you purchased men for God, from every tribe and language and people and nation.

I'm not saying let's pretend racism doesn't exist. It does exist, and in more than one form, and it's evil.

What I am saying, is that I hope that we will stop turning non-race related things into politically correct racism. It helps no one, and creates if not encourages and furthers a "we vs. them" mentality. The "WE" should be all of us in our humanity, not people group vs. people group.

I will be praying for President-Elect Obama. That has nothing to do with his skin color, or the fact that he is a White Sox fan (Thank God)!

Big Trip with In-Laws

2008-08-01T18:57:00.002-05:00

We have been planning for a long time to travel with family to San Antonio. Marque’s parents are gracious and help us with the finances, otherwise I don’t think we would/could do it with 6 of us.

We all try and do a vacation of some sort together every couple/few years, and as there are 25 in-laws altogether, it is always a fun/interesting/challenging experience.

It gives the kids a chance to spend extra time with cousins and aunts/uncles too, so it’s really become a nice little tradition over our first 14 years of our marriage.

Historically we have vacationed as in-laws to:

Albequerque

Orlando

Colorado

Branson

Honolulu

And this summer was San Antonio

Maybe Chicago will be in our future?

Details about my family’s activities from this year's San Antonio trip:

Day 1 of our vacation was pretty uneventful, but still quite nice. We cleaned the house, packed up some stuff, and basically got around to eventually leaving for Oklahoma City after a delayed lunch.

It took about 3 ½ hours to drive there, and after checking in to our budget motel we grabbed dinner at Shorty Smalls. We “thought” this was going to be a great budget choice because the sign on the window said “Kids Eat Free.” Unfortunately, the small tiny letters you couldn’t see from the road said “on Mondays.” As this was a Wednesday, dinner was 2x more expensive then we had hoped for. Oh well.

A little blessing was that Macye’s kids dinner was unexpectedly HUGE…lots of leftover chicken and French fries. As we got back to our hotel there was a homeless guy dumpster diving for food, so we were able to pass along the blessing as we had got a to-go box.

Afterwards the kids swam really hard for about an hour as the sun went down, and then crashed in our room. Payton was very proud to sleep on the floor, since his big brother John was as well. Very cute!

Day 2 was unique to say the least! We arrived at the Amtrak terminal by 7am, and were on our way soon after. We choo-chooed all the way to Fort Worth, TX, where we had a 2 hour layover. This took much longer than expected. But we hung out, played games, and just had a good time.

Unfortunately, Amtrak was wayyyyy late, so we were very hungry once we got the station. Fortunately there was a Subway nearby, so we invaded it as a group. Once again, when we got done eating…Macye and Payton combined had a ton of left overs ( I promise we weren’t over-ordering!). And once again, when we went outside, there were people who probably hadn’t eaten much that day. This time there was a lady with 2 little girls on leashes, and she happily took the food. Let’s just say this continued to be a theme on our trip. Very sad.

Much later in the evening (7:15pm) Amtrak had promised to feed us dinner, but cancelled on us 15 minutes before our reservation in the dining car. This was not a pleasant discovery, and even the conductor came back to personally apologize as he disagreed with the decision and thought we should request a full refund due to the terrible customer service.

Thankfully we were able to get some hot dogs from the ala carte type area just before it closed. We were on the train late into the evening, but on the whole we really enjoyed it!

Day 3 We took in the Alamo, took big naps, and a had nice dinner at a Mexican restaurant overlooking the Riverwalk in San Antonio. Not too stressful of day, though very hot! San Antonio really is a unique city, and even though we didn’t, I certainly recommend anyone visiting there to get a hotel that is located right on the River Walk. There is much to see and do in that area!

Day 4 was a colossal disappointment. I had been looking so forward to Schlitterbahn as it is so well regarded as the World’s Greatest Water Park. Unfortunately it felt like they allowed 20,000 people into the park. Seriously. And the park felt big enough for maybe 10% of that. In the 8+ hours we were there, we managed to ride 4 rides. That’s it. The lines were atrocious, and it was cruel to be able to SEE many cool rides that you had no hope of ever getting on. Terrible park management to say the least. And the prices are terrible. :( Very sad.

Day 5 was very similar to Day 3 for our family, except that Marque, Macye, and Payton started to get fevers. Fortunately John and Reagan still got to go to Sea World with some cousins, so they weren’t as stranded around sick people. The rest of us laid pretty low on the whole, although we had wonderful little lunch by the Riverwalk by the mall. Later in the evening I went to the late show of DARK KNIGHT with a bunch of in-laws. What a movie! Afterwards I had the most bizarre parking garage experience...that might earn it's own blog if I have time someday. Crazy.

Day 6 we all went to Sea World….and WOW…IT WAS GREAT! I truly thought it was just fish with a ride or two. Wrong. There was a waterpark for swimming and fun, multiple rollercoaster rides (that were great), and of course good shows and yes…fish. I was blown away at how much fun there is to be had there, and wished I had another day to go back and do more. Definitely worth the price of admission! The park staff was professional, and there was space to move around. Even when you had to stand in line for something, it was a short line, and shaded or air conditioned. What a great place! Unfortunately Marque and the shorties were still not feeling great, so I had to run them home mid-day. But me and the older boys stayed until almost closing later on, and really took in a lot. Sharks are cool!

Day 7 was another travel day. Amtrak could be a GREAT way to travel, but unfortunately their staff lacks professionalism. We were on the train @ 7am, and they didn’t start serving any coffee or anything else until after 11:30am. I have many more examples than that, but won’t digress. However, an interesting development was that there was a stock car derailment down the line, so at one point they traveled us BACKWARDS 2 hours, and then stuck us on busses. By the time we got to Oklahoma City, it was 1:30am that night! Of course, then we drove home where we arrived @ 5am. So it was a huge traveling marathon…but since I enjoy travel…I really wasn’t too bothered personally. Our kids had great attitudes throughout, as they could play with cousins, draw, play gameboys, etc. Despite the challenges, I liked taking the Amtrak!

Summary:
Great fun. If I did it again I would spend more time at Sea World, not even try Schlitterbahn, and make sure to stay at a hotel directly connected to the Riverwalk.

Baseball World Series and Memphis trip

2008-07-21T15:33:00.001-05:00

My Dad and my two oldest sons and myself had a great time in the Memphis Tennessee area for John’s 10u USSSA “AAA” World Series. Technically the games and our hotel were in Southaven, Mississippi, but it is all really the Memphis area. Initially it was just the four of us, but J only had a game or two each day, so there was some downtime.

On Reagan’s 9^th birthday we had LOTS of fun! First of all, as his name is Elvis, my Dad did the honors of taking Reagan/Elvis to see the original Elvis’ Graceland mansion. I had been there before, and John had batting cage practice, so we didn’t all go. Plus, the prices for that were ridiculous, but at least the two of them got to go. My Dad was never a huge Elvis fan (though I know he had a record when I was a kid), but I think he was even pleasantly surprised at house interesting the basic Mansion tour was.

Later that day, the 4 us of had dinner at B.B. Kings restaurant on Beale street. The live band was GREAT, and the food was pretty good too. We hung out for quite awhile, as we all were having so much fun. It was great to see our boys laughing and singing along to old classics that my Dad and I knew, but were new to them. The lady singing had an Aretha Franklin vibe going on, and it’s hard to put into words how laid back yet entertaining it was. People were singing along, eating, laughing, cheering…just a great place to have a birthday dinner…even for a 9 year old! I’m sure the place turns into more of a “bar scene” later at night, but it was perfectly fine for dinner time for a family.

Another day the 4 of us went down to Mud Island and rode the suspension train, and then visited the museum and riverwalk. Marque and I have been wanting to this for years, because the Island is featured as part of the story in the old action/suspense movie “The Firm.” That movie came out about the time we were married, and it also featured Grand Cayman (which is where we honeymooned), so we have long said that we need to visit Mud Island.

We really weren’t in any hurry, so we were able to take our time and pay attention to many of the exhibits. I was surprised at how much John and Reagan really enjoyed the museum. In my mind, a 9 and a 10 year old would hate something like that, but it was the opposite. They both religiously listened to the free mp3 players the museum provided, and actually were both vocally thankful afterwards. Plus there is/was a semi-topographically accurate rendition of the lower Mississippi river complete with water to stroll in/on/around on the island. Remember, that this is while you are on an island on the Mississippi…so it was pretty cool. And though it was a HOT day, the boys splashed in the water and had a great time. Our total time to do all of this was about 2 ½ hours.

Back to baseball, John hit well and was truly a consistent spark plug for his team. Don’t get me wrong, baseball is a TEAM game. 1 guy can’t do it on his own. But time and again he started rally’s that helped get his team get going on offense…and he steals bases like they are candy! On top of that, he played some incredible defense. He played better than I have ever seen him play before, and on the biggest stage he’s ever been on. A couple times he made great grabs and throws that I didn’t think anybody was going to make a play on…but he was so fast an smooth that he managed to throw the base runner out. It was incredible!

Mid-week Marque and my mom and the other two kids joined us and got to take in a few games as well. All-in-all it was a great week, though they eventually lost. But of the 44 teams that were there (representing 12 different U.S. states), they made it further than any other Arkansas team, and made it to the final 16. They lost a heartbreaker in the last inning that would have propelled them further into the Championship round, but as a team….and John individually…they certainly left the World Series having played like Champs. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say I felt a sense of pride in how my boy hustled and played like a man!

Vacation and Travel

2008-07-10T15:24:00.001-05:00

I love travel. It’s always an adventure for me to go to new places, or even places I have been before though not in awhile. However…I hate being away from my family for long. The next few weeks will be fun though, as I’m going to travel with my family off an on.

First, John has his baseball world series about 5 hours east of us. Then I will be home and work for a few days before we are going to go on a legit family vacation and drive 4 hours west of us…where we will get on an Amtrak train and head to San Antonio with our 25 closest in-laws from Marque’s side of the family. That will be fun as we plan to hit Sea World and the #1 rated waterpark in the world. Then it’s back home for a bit more work before we head to Iowa for a few days before school gets started up for the kids again. While there, we plan to hit the country's #1 rated State Fair!

What is so cool for me is that I get to do all of that with my family. If I didn’t feel so called to do what I’m doing where I’m doing it, I’d love being one of those Travel Channel hosts going to all sorts of exotic places, trying new foods and such. However…that’s not totally true...because I’d miss my beautiful wife and kids too much! Oh well…at least we get to travel a bit TOGETHER a few times over the next month or so.

Summer Sizzlin' By Quickly

2008-07-08T16:00:00.003-05:00

It's hard to believe that summer is pretty much half gone. We haven't had our vacation...yet...so maybe it will seem like it's okay for summer to be flying by once we finally have some time away (that doesn't involve a baseball game!). Some recent stuff that has been going on:

Marque had her shoulder surgery last week, and they repaired her rotator cuff and took out some bone spurs (ouch!). We are hoping that she is nearing the end of this season of medical issues. She is recovering well, but it's a process.
John's baseball team wrapped up the most of their summer schedule with another tournament win last weekend. That is 8 tournament wins in 1 summer. Amazing! They are going to compete in the World Series 10AAA next week.
Reagan's baseball team finished the season ranked #1 in 8AA for Arkansas. He also was selected to personally be on the All-State team...which means a 1 day honorary game early in August.
I have still been busy with Exago, but less so than normal. Meanwhile I've done a few more surveillances then normal...which is necessary with all these baseball things and an upcoming vacation time!
Macye had a wonderful ballet recital at the end of May, but is currently on break.
Payton is just still such a combination of stinker and sweetie. He LOVES two activities more than any other: Swinging the baseball bat, and playing Bomberman on Xbox!

Do you know what my side-job is?

2008-06-12T22:08:00.004-05:00

Perhaps it's because of it's inconsistent nature, or perhaps it's because I don't talk about it much, ...but though it is not a secret....most people I know don't know what my side job is.

See, my passion/call/drive/etc. is ministry. I love and am called to Pastoring as a way of life, and of course I do this vocationally as well with Exago. I have an undergraduate and a graduate degree in ministry related fields, and still intend to do my Ph.D. someday. But my side-job is COMPLETELY unrelated.

You see, my side-job is one of those odd things that many people get all weird about. They have misplaced delusions of grandeur about this work, so I typically don't even bring it up. But....in the interest of full-disclosure.....and because I don't recall having ever written about it before...here is the truth:
I am a liscensed Private Investigator.

I got into it rather naturally. My Dad was a cop for many years, so I grew up learning to think somewhat like a cop. Furthermore, my Dad started a P.I. company when I was still in my teens. On my 18th birthday I celebrated it alone, because I was finally legally allowed to work for my Dad's company. I spent the evening serving legal papers to unsuspecting residents of about 5 households in Carlisle, Iowa (I think the documents were regarding bounced checks if I remember right).

Over the years I have certainly gone through long periods where I have barely done any work of this nature. And then I have had short periods where I have been very active. But generally speaking I haven't really had the time or desire to do it full-time.

However, over the past year and half I have been doing this sort of work about 3-4 days out of the month to supplement my limited ministry income. Usually I get some downtime during those days when I can get a bunch of Exago work done too, so it works out great.

More recently, last night I got a call after 10pm to go and pull a GPS tracking unit out from underneath a vehicle of someone who was unsuspectingly being legally tracked (don't ask for details). I took care of it.

This evening Marque asked how my little assignment had worked, and I explained that it was less than ideal as I had to sneak down a long dark driveway and climb down underneath a vehicle in near pitch black conditions to grab the tracking unit.

I thought her response might be something be like, "What!?"

But instead she said, "That's pretty cool, you should blog about that."

So there you go.

Baseball Family

2008-05-28T19:16:00.007-05:00

We are a baseball family. Some people think we are crazy. We don't really care!!!
We love watching it...especially live. Each year we go to at least one White Sox game...sometimes in Chicago...lately in Kansas City...plus we usually catch another 1 or 2.

But more than watching, we love PLAYING it!
I could go on and on about my boys teams this year, but it would take too long. So a quick summary is:

John is on the 10 year old Rogers Redhawks. They started slow, but as of late have been on an unbelievable tear...winning 19 of their last 20 games. As of today they are 23-5, have won 4 consecutive tournaments, and recently they manhandled an 11 year old tournament in Branson, Mo. Pretty rare for a team to play older kids and win the game, much less the whole tournament! John personally is having a great year at the plate and in the field, and is an important part of their success. He has amazing range at 2nd base!

Reagan is on the 8 year old Arkansas Dirtbags. They are 18-5, and have played in the championship game of their last 4 tournaments...going 2-2 in those games. He has hit for more power this year than ever before, and his glove has also improved quite a bit in the field. He has an amazing arm, and usually plays 3rd base or pitcher!

Right now is when both teams start to get a little extra serious, as they prepare to play in State Championships late in June. It's a lot of fun...but a little tiring!

ROGERS REDHAWKS TEAM AFTER A BIG WIN

ARKANSAS DIRTBAGS
Oops...Reagan covered his face on this one!

Elvis Lives

2008-05-28T18:54:00.003-05:00

One of the reasons that Reagan was nicknamed Elvis at an early age, was because he has ALWAYS loved rock music with a driving rhythm. Even as a baby, if something with driving guitars or drums came on, his countenance would change and he would start bobbing his head in rhythm.
To this day, he is a natural at the drums on the "Rockband" video game. He might not put it in these terms yet...but the kid has always...always...loved to rock. Let's just say he didn't get this genetically from his mother. He and John like to listen to Christian Rock music as they go to sleep at night...and they don't like "Mom's Music" very often.

A couple weeks back, John and Reagan were at school, and Marque was doing a bit of painting in Payton's room. He doesn't have a stereo in his room, so I went and found one of her "Point of Grace" CD's and put it in John/Reagan's CD player in their room, and jacked the music up loud. Point of Grace is a popular music group of 4 female singers, who have a type of a slow Contemporary Christian Music thing going on. Personally I can't stand them for very long, but I know Marque enjoys them so I figured she would enjoy it.
Eventually she got done, and the music ended, and we forgot the CD was still in John/Reagan's CD player...and that the speaker volume was still set to a high level.

That night when it was bedtime, I prayed with the boys..said good night...and pushed play on their CD player as I walked out of the room. Of course, 4 female voices singing acapala sprang loudly into the air.

Reagan was in complete shock...and very seriously...and very loudly...declared, "WHAT IN THE WORLD!?"

I think Marque and I cried/laughed for 5 minutes about this. He was appeased only after we put some Christian Rock music on...but Reagan never did figure out why Marque and I thought his natural response was so funny.

Mommy, you must look like a toilet to them!

2008-05-28T18:49:00.002-05:00

We were driving down the street recently, and it was a nice cool spring day. Our windows were open, there was a nice breeze in the car, and Marque was looking beautiful.
Then it happened...a bird with crazy aim had a direct hit. It came in Marque's window and splatted on her shoulder...sending "tidbits and remnants" flying in the car.

Marque was bit shocked, but the shorties were quite entertained. We had to explain to them where the bird poop had come from of course. We were in a bit of a laughing shock already, when Macye matter of factly declared,
"Mommy, you must have looked like a toilet to them."

Then we really started laughing.

A Night At The BallPark

2008-04-12T09:07:00.001-05:00

THE GREAT FAMILY TIME AND MEMORIES

This past Thursday evening, Marque and I surprised John and Reagan and took them to the inaugural game of the new AA baseball team. The Arkansas Naturals have a new stadium, and they are new to town as well.

Almost needless to say, it was fun. The boys were THRILLED, and we helped them both purchase a new ball cap while we were there to commemorate the occasion.

When I showed them the tickets late in the afternoon, I was leaning/laying on our bed, and told them I had something to share. I basically told them that they couldn’t go to their team baseball practices that night. John looked a little upset at first until he looked at the tix and started yelling in glee.

“YOU GOT EM’?! REALLY!!?? Yeah! Thank you thank you thank you thank you, etc.” and then he and Regan proceed to jump on top of me and run around the room dancing and yelling.

The team wasn’t very good, but we had great tix that were very affordable. The stadium has a very nice layout, and is very nice once you get inside. Nice open concourses, beautiful field, and just a nice place for a family baseball outing.

During the last inning the boys played around on a playground set in the family area just past Center Field. The wind blew a little cold, but it was nice to have my arm around Marque…talking, laughing, loving. Good times.

THE HILLBILLY TWIGHLIGHT ZONE

The game was fun, yet it was hillbilly baseball for sure. Several things about the evening made it clear that Northwest Arkansas has a LONG way to go. Here is an incomplete list of weirdness:

The ballpark is in Springdale Arkansas, but parking was actually worse than Comiskey or Wrigley in Chicago. This despite the fact that they have fields and fields of level, empty space nearby. It took us 45 minutes to get parked once we were a mile from the stadium.
The lady behind us thought every hit was going to be a homerun, and/or that every foul ball was going to hit us. She would scream at the weirdest times, and was trying to tease John because once she tried (and failed) to scare him into thinking he was going to get hit by a foul ball. Of course…John would catch the thing if it would have been anywhere near us…but no balls came very close…so he had this look on his face like “lady…you aren’t funny but you might be crazy”.
Yes it was a sell-out and yes this was opening night…but if you wanted ANYTHING from the concession stand it took 3 INNINGS of waiting in line. That’s right…3 innings. And the first window we went to had ran out of peanuts already…before game time. I think that was downright un-American.
Some no talent, girly-haired, country boy by the name of Joe Nichols sang what was probably the WORST national anthem we have ever heard in our lives. I guess he is famous? Marque and I were trying to be respectful, but kept laughing because it was so twangy and awful…just awful….but the people around us were thrilled. Apparently they all knew who he was b/c they were pulling out camera phones and getting autographs of him and his woman. Of course, because I have this kind of luck…he came right over and stood by our row about 2 people from us…all grins and “aw shucks.” Meanwhile we couldn’t see the baseball game b/c of all the hillbilly fools wanting to give him love. It was ridiculous.
Later, Marque was super awesome and decided that I needed peanuts and that she would wait in-line in a different concession area to get them for me. After standing by the same people and chit-chatting for 30 minutes while waiting to make her purchase, Marque mentioned something to the lady in line in front of her. She said something like, “This is taking sooo long. It’s like they are surprised people came to the game tonight.” As it turns out, that lady was the Springdale Mayor’s wife (and he had just thrown out a “first pitch” a bit earlier). Of course, the lady got defensive about the ballpark people “just working out some kinks.” The Mayor then joined her in line a few minutes later. Hilarious.

Magazine Cover

2008-03-31T09:59:00.003-05:00

Awhile back a newer friend of mine asked me to stop by his Christian bookstore during a photo shoot. I was already planning to drop by that day anyway, as there was a book I wanted for Marque's birthday.
One thing led to another, they asked me to sit down at a table with a couple other people that I really hadn't known previously...and there you go. I'm on the cover of Christianity Today.

Nope, I don't get any royalties, but I have had a couple of people call or text me from across the country to say that they saw it and thought it was cool.

My modeling career is probably over though. I had a good run.

Rain

2008-03-18T15:55:00.002-05:00

Spring Break has brought spring rains....lots and lots of rain. We just tried our new batting cage yesterday, and now it's partially underwater. I don't think it has stopped raining since last night. Ugh.
I think we are going to go to the gym this evening to get everyone out of the house. This house is big enough on most days, but this doesn't seem like one of them.

Busy...FUN!

2008-03-14T13:17:00.001-05:00

Marque seems to be doing pretty well lately, so lately our schedule has been dominated by ministry and kids sports things.
Ministry: Wow....I love seeing how Exago is growing. I am looking very forward to having full-support as the team of supporters continue to give and we add new teammates. This isn't a ministry newsletter though, so I'm not going to spend too much time discussing it. I will say this...Exago is NEEDED...and I love it building it and ministering to Youth Leaders.

Kids Sports:
Macye is doing ballet and loving it! She has a recital next month. She is so cute and bouncy.

Reagan and John played on a couple of basketball teams together this year...Upwards and City League. They both loved it, and finished with a combined record of 13-1. Reagan plays-up with the 4th graders so that he can be on John's team. He usually is the youngest and shortest kid out there....and usually the best player after John too. Reagan even had a few 20 point games, so size is no object to him!!!

John has grown so much as a basketball player this year it was just incredible. We also let him play on a competitive team, which really seemed to expose how hard he has worked and how much he loves it. I think his team record when he played (they split it into 2 teams) was probably 10-2.
The guys he played with on the last night won a mini-tournament, and his highlight game of the year was also that night. He not only had MANY steals, blocks, deflections, assists, etc...but he also has some no-look passes, dribbles through his legs, and he actually scored 16 of his teams 23 points! He and his teammates won that game 23-16. It was incredible.

Now we are quickly transitioning to competitive baseball as Spring is upon us. Is it any wonder we skip football!?

fruit is sweet

2008-03-07T10:47:00.003-06:00

Every now and then I hear about something that encourages me personally about the long-term implications of ministry.

Yesterday I ran into Duke Revard, who remembered me from when I worked with him and his age group when I was a on staff at Fellowship Bible Church of Lowell, and he was in 7th grade back in 1994.
Now I can't take any direct credit for the cool things that have happened with Duke since then, as I barely knew him then and have long since lost contact. However, he is a recent seminary graduate, and is building a team of people to church plant. www.lodgepole.org
On a similar note, Finley Robinson was once a kid from that same youth group..and he has now been a youth pastor for about 7 years, is married, and they are expecting their 3rd child. Wow how
Wow how time flies. I feel kinda old! But honestly, I love it anytime I hear about someone I ministered to, who is now ministering to others. Very cool.

32 of my many reasons why I will never vote for Hillary

2008-03-07T09:47:00.002-06:00

Thoughts and Happenings

2008-02-18T08:34:00.000-06:00

Had to run Marque back to Little Rock a few days back b/c of fluid build-up in her head. Fortunately the doc didn’t see this as a big issue, and “merely” stuck a big needle in the back of her head and drained it. Wow.
Marque had another one of those birthday things come and go. Praise God. I’m more thankful then ever to have her still by my side.
John and Reagan continue to excel at basketball. They both have made big contributions on their teams. They have played together on 2 teams…City League and Upwards. They finished Upwards 5-1 and are currently 5-0 with 3 games remaining in City League. Fortunately the season barely overlapped, so it has seemed more like 1 longer season. Meanwhile baseball is slowly starting to get busier and busier…
John also has been playing what I consider something closer to REAL basketball in a competitive league. He LOVES it. They are 4-2, and man oh man can those little kids play. John has a great coach who is also a high-school basketball coach, so he is learning some things as a 4^th grader that I wasn’t taught until I was in 10^th grade…pretty impressive. He enjoys it so much, I wish I could buy him something that will make him 6’6 when he grows up. Sorry kid…Dad never even made it to a true 6 foot. I tell him to watch and learn from Steve Nash, Kirk Hinrich, and other fast but short guards who can shoot and pass!
Payton turns 4 years old today! What a joy he is. And cute! He might be in a magazine next month. We’re not trying to market him as a model, just knew the right people who asked at the right time for us to be in the right place and a whole bunch of pix were taken. We’ll see.
Macye is an “artist.” She goes through crayons, pencils, and paper at an unreal pace.
I’m busy with building Exago again, and have had some excellent recent opportunities to minister to and pray with local youth pastors. Simultaneously I have suddenly had a spate of surveillances (which are a needed blessing), so I’ve been on the road to Springfield and back 4 of the past 9 days. Plus that run to Little Rock with Marque, and you could say that my iPod gets used more than anyone else I know.

Beyond that…I’m really happy about the sun coming up a little earlier and going down a little later each day. The sun gives me energy, makes me more productive, and gets me outside with our kids more.

I was just telling Marque yesterday that I think Christmas Day should actually be celebrated on the Spring Daylight Savings day (2^nd Sunday of March), since it is such euphoria. So…maybe I should send Christmas Cards by/before March 9^th this year?

Bye Africa, Hello Home

2008-02-07T18:19:00.000-06:00

I missed my family greatly, and was thrilled to get home last Thursday. Such a joy to see Marque up and about some more, and to love on our kids again.

South Africa was so much fun for me to experience...here's a few things I ran out of time to blog about:

a lady accepted Christ at one of Tonya's Bible studies while I was there. Praise God!
there were several wild fires in the area, whipped up by the winds that blow. I even got a pic of a helicopter with a bucket on the bottom that was transporting water from the nearby pond to dump on the fires.

On my last day, I got to do a trifecta of fun:

SURFING! I surfed in the morning
BASEBALL! I ran into some children of ex-patriot Americans who were trying to play baseball on the beach in the early afternoon, and ended up coaching and playing with them for about a 1/2 hour. Boys hit off a tee until age 10 in South Africa, so developmentally these boys were similar in talent to where our boys were at when they were 7 years old.
BASKETBALL! I was able to play with the Masiphumelele team once again. Unfortunately I got tripped unintentionally and ended up messing my knee up again...but at least that was at the end of the day.

Happy Time

2008-01-29T01:14:00.000-06:00

Today was the first basketball practice since my bags arrived full of shoes/jersies/shorts. Kevin had to be a little careful about distributing anything other than the jersies, as not ALL guys need shoes yet. However, several guys really needed them immedately...and were very excited.

One guy confidentaly stated again and again that he wears size 9, as that was what his current shoes said. But...they looked and felt tight when saw his feet. I asked him to let me measure his foot, and sure enough...he needed an 11!!! The guy was playing in shoes 2 sizes too small, but just thought that was normal. Ouch! I was able to hook him up with the shoes I had worn there, and he quickly commented on how very comfortable they were. LOL

Anyway, pix say a lot. There were some very happy ballers at practice today.

ZZ always wears a hat to cover up one of the most shocking knife scars I have seen in my life. But he was stylin' today in his new jersey and shoes. Kevin gave him some shorts right after I took this pic too.

Vuyeah went from a size 9 to a size 11!

Happy guys!

New Missionary Friends

2008-01-28T12:33:00.001-06:00

I have really enjoyed spending some time with some of the Stanfields missionary friends that also live here. Sunday night we had dinner with some of them, and food and laughter seemed to flow continuously.

THE SCHIEN FAMILY
Holger is German, and his wife Jilly is from New Zealand. They have 3 charming and well mannered boys, who are all quite passionate about gymnastics. Holger is a lifeguard, but his main duties surround training discipleship leaders. Before their family moved here, they lived in England for many years. Thus the boys have great accents that make me think of the story “Oliver” every time they speak.

TIM ILLIYIA DUCKYOUNG
Tim is a missionary from

Nigeria

with YWAM. As he is single, he is able to voluntarily live in the small building that YWAM/ALL NATIONS owns within Masiphumelele. You would never know that he got attacked by some thugs soon after moving into the area, because he is EVERYONES friend now.

Tim helps Kevin with the basketball team, and though he loves clothing, he didn’t have basketball shoes. He went crazy with joy when we were able to give him a jersey, shorts, and shoes. He was dancing around, singing, and pretending to dribble a basketball in Stanfields kitchen. He is a very kind guy, so to see him be blessed was a blessing to me.

Won't you take me to...MONKEY town?

2008-01-28T07:28:00.000-06:00

Sunday we spent the morning at Monkey Town. It is WONDERFUL how many family friendly places there are here. And the prices are substantially lower then one would expect. If airfare/distance wasn't such a problem, I would bring my family to this area often.

Monkey Town is just one of many examples of places around Capetown that are combination restaurant/bar/playground/entertainment "farm." While we ate, Chesney spent time nearby jumping on a trampoline, going down little water slides, and just messing about. Meanwhile there were many monkeys to take in of course, as well as some other tame wildlife.

These particular monkeys are called Marmosets...they are very expressive facially...and really curious. Some people keep them as pets!

These guys followed us everywhere they could because of the little squishy toy.

Kevin and Asher sharing a Cappucino

There were lots of other random animals around the farm, such as this tame Dairy Cow...er...dog!?

Huge huge dog...just hilarious.

Asher!!!

Holiday

2008-01-28T06:33:00.000-06:00

South Africa

has many strong British influences. This is obvious from which side of the road they drive on, to their food, to certain phrases that have become the norm over the years. Some of my favorites:

Trunk of the car: The "Boot"

Your Welcome: "Pleasure" (but the r is silent)

Vacation: "holiday"

Another large variation is the tone used when asking questions. Americans finish a question by dropping by lowering their tone. Here, people raise it, and often add an extra phrase. Such as:

"You are on holiday, yes?"(holiday and yes are both in a higher tone).

This past Saturday was definately the most down time we've had since I arrived. So we took in:

Cape Point (southern most tip of Africa)

Table Mountain (high point that overlooks Capetown with stunning views)

Did a bit of shopping at the open air tables.

Future desktop background for my pc at home!

Going UP

Can't really explain how fast those clouds appeared to be rushing off the mountain, but it was incredible to watch.

The Southern Tip of Africa

2008-01-26T09:26:00.000-06:00

You can't get any more South on the Continent of Africa than this!

Have I mentioned it is beautiful here? Stanfields are a good lookin' family too!

basketball and bible study

2008-01-25T14:41:00.001-06:00

Two of Kevin's major time commitments are centered around relationships developed via basketball and bible study.
The Bible study part is really cool to witness, as many of the young men who ball with him Monday through Thursday, will then come to a 2+ hour Bible study and really interact. It was incredible to hear some of the guys asking very important theological questions, and great to see how Kevin steeered them towards the scriptures for answers. It was also great to see the depth of knowledge and wisdom that some of these baby Christians already have, and to hear them share about their passion for sharing Christ with their unbelieving friends. Wow.
Meanwhile, playing basketball with these guys is fun too. I would have probably enjoyed it a lot more when I was young and could fly, but hey...it's a great time...and it a great outreach tool for Kevin.
I had a touch of Montezumas revenge today. Thank God for the medicines I brought with me as a prevention.

Yawning as I write this

2008-01-24T15:45:00.000-06:00

Today was a good day and a lot happened I will blog about later. However, it is almost midnight here and I can't seem to get ahold of Marque or the kids via Instant Messenger (might be a bad connection).
So...I'm going to bed in a minute.

Probably the surprise highlight of my day was IMing with Marque at 10am this morning. She happened to be awake at 2am her time (when I sent a quick note), and she responded! So we got to talk for a few minutes. It was a good day, but that was by far my favorite part of it.

Again, having a good time, and seeing a lot of sweet ministry stuff, and it's gorgeous. But I really love and miss my family all the same.

More later.

Views from Stanfields neighborhood

2008-01-23T15:52:00.001-06:00

Nightfall here is amazing. I took this pic just down the street from Stanfields house.
Yes, that is a serene little pond in the foreground.
Yes, that is the ocean in the background.
Yes, those are mountains too.
Gorgeous.

That little Euro red car is Stanfields only means of transportation. I'm not sure what that mess of green tarp is around the tree on the adjoining lot, but it's about the only ugly thing in this middle class neighborhood where they rent.

Penguins in Africa

2008-01-23T15:41:00.000-06:00

A lot of people don't know that several years back, a whole colony of penguins moved to South Africas southern tip. This is only about 15 minutes from Stanfields place.

I'm wearing Kevins clothes still. The airport doesn't have my bags and doesn't seem too rushed. Oh well.

YWAM and ALL NATIONS Leadership Meetings

2008-01-23T11:40:00.000-06:00

Aproximately 30 missionareis from the area are gathering each morning this week (all are associated with YWAM or ALL NATIONS. ALL NATIONS is much like YWAM with a church planting focus). Kevin and Tonya are affiliated with both, and I was invited to attend their leader this meetings today and over the next couple days.
This morning's meeting was about 4 hours of worshiping, praying, discussion, and listening to all the missionaries talk about their dreams and how God is leading them in focus over the next year. It was great to be along for the ride, and to pray God's blessing upon them.

Masi, basketball, missions

2008-01-23T11:12:00.000-06:00

I had the pleasure yesterday of playing basketball with and getting to know a bunch of missionaries and even more residents of Masiphumelele. Kevin coaches the team, so it was fun to see him in that role. The court is a blacktop surface in permanent need of repair, but they make do. I played with them for the better part of an hour and half. Though it was fun, that blacktop played some havoc on my right knee that I have had previous problems with.
So far the airlines still have not been able to confirm if my luggage was found or not, it was/is full of shoes, shorts, and jersies for these guys. Ugh.
I will probably add some pictures of the guys to this post later.

Kevin has a partner in ministry in discipling some of the young men of Masi. He is Nigerian born man by the name of Tim. What a great guy! Although rumor is that you don't want to stick around if he offers to cook some of his native food for you (eel soup)!
Their goals are:

to get some guys alreadly identified as leaders, to start multiplying themselves through discipling others in their community...with a goal of someday planting a church.
to raise funds or find some sponsors for the basketball team (probably around $500 worth of league/travel fees/etc).

Meanwhile, Tonya has her own dreams for the next year, and there are other missionaries in the area who share some of them and will be working with her:

establishing a safehouse for throw-away babies (i.e., women in desperation will drop off their children here to be moved along to social services, rather then just tossing them in a dumpster). They have enough things ready that this will probably only cost $500
finding funding for an all expense paid Masiphumelele pastors marriage retreat ( probably over $1000 in costs)
empowering some African women to start their own small groups for helping other African women who are dealing with domestic violence/abuse

Cheers from South Africa

2008-01-22T15:03:00.000-06:00

South African Suburbia!

Chewie is one of the largest and heaviest 6 month old puppies I have ever seen. 90+ lbs. ?

3 of the 4 Stanfields in front of their house (baby Asher asleep inside).

Tonya and Chesney on their trampoline in the front yard. I am infatuated with the cool trees around here.

My friend of 16 years, Kevin Stanfield (with the sun in his eyes).

Waking Up in Capetown

2008-01-22T03:09:00.000-06:00

Stanfields have a very pleasant home in a midde-class community which is only about 2 minutes from the shantytown they minister in/to. I got about 6 hours of sleep last night, and then got up to ride along with Kevin when he was taking Chesney (grade 2) to school.

I'm feeling pretty great. I've had just enough sleep, a good breakfast, and am blessed t0 have access to their computer/internet. After breakfast this morning, Stanfields left me in charge of their house for a few hours while they tend to some mandatory YWAM Leadership meetings. They have a huge dog (a bull mastiff mix) that has the same personality as our dog (Comet), so he and I went for a little walk in the neighborhood already.

The geography here is beautiful, but odd. In some ways it feels like Southern California (it's summer), and there are 2 Oceans not far from here. The soil is very sandy. This is a 1st world country, and there are some really nice cars and houses.
Meanwhile, there is a lot of poverty and sickness here as well. I questioned Kevin about the stats I had found saying that some areas have 40% AIDS, and he said it is probably actually closer to 30%...which is still terrible. Plus it is considered culturally shameful to have AIDS.

He said he thinks that there are a couple of different reasons for this, which are both societal:

A myth persists that if you are an African male with AIDS, the best way to cure yourself is to rape a young woman. Of course this just propigates the issue in an evil way.
A conflicting myth (though equally wrong) is that AIDS doesn't really exist anyway. This is explained by saying that people simply get sick. Thus AIDS is actually a lie that white men made up to keep blacks (that is what they call black people here, and it is not considered a racist term) and coloreds (anybody not black but not white either) from procreating.

A lot is being done to fight AIDS, but the stranglehold the above misinformation has on the people is shocking. My information at this point is very limited, but it seems obvious that many in the South African government are not that concerned about the issue either, as it largely affects the poor.

This afternoon Kevin and I will be going to Masiphumelele to play basketball with several young men he has been befriending, witnessing to, and discipling. Just yesterday he had to turn away 3 guys who wanted to play basketball with him on the rough blacktop, but could only watch because they didn't have shoes. I hope my bags arrive tonight, as I brought several pair for him to give to these types of guys.

Traveling to Africa

2008-01-22T02:47:00.000-06:00

My flight from Arkansas, USA... to Capetown, South Africa....involved 4 flights, 2 naps, some odd though interesting conversations, 2 movies, and lost luggage which led to missing a flight....all in about a 30 hour window.

4 flights- Arkansas to Cincinnati, to D.C., to Johannusburg, to Capetown
2 naps- one 3-4 hours, one 2 hours
Interesting conversations- A retired autoworker turned flight attendant, an in-home direct sales marketer switching from adult novelties to ladies clothing (since her kids are getting older), a Chinese/American engineer based out of Maryland, a restuaranteer, and some South African Airways employees who wanted a $20 tip (a minute after I left the counter)just for doing their jobs. They got $4 to split 3-ways.
3:10 to Yuma, and a movie so dumb I turned it off and won't honor it by naming it
Lost luggage- Once in Johannesburg, I missed my connecting flight waiting for my baggage from D.C. Apparently they didn't process my bags correctly and they were/are still at Dulles

Kevin Stanfield and his kids (Asher and Chesney) were waiting for me at Capetown airport, which was good. I had made an international phone call from my cell phone as I got on a different flight in J-burg, and was able to talk with Marque for a couple of minutes. She was then good enough to send a quick email to Stanfields alerting them of my delay. That made a big difference b/c Tonya was able to call Kevin and pass along the news as to when I would be actually arriving.

It was about a 20 minute drive to their house. In the dark Capetown looks like a cross between Tulsa, Ok., and Juarez, Mexico.

Marque as of January 18

2008-01-18T11:44:00.001-06:00

Marque’s old headaches are pretty much gone, but her new “post-surgery” headaches (which are in a different place) are still lingering. About the only thing she can do when those start pounding is to retreat to the bedroom and get some quiet.

The good news is that most days she seems to do a little bit better. This is a slow healing process, as we were told it would be. It has been 5 weeks since her surgery, and they said it could be 6 before she starts feeling a whole lot better…so she is on schedule.

Marque’s good times during the days are short, but she makes the most of them. Sometimes she will try and help prepare a meal, or do a little straightening around the house.

On different occasions she has been able to briefly leave the house to go to Walmart for a short time, attend a church worship service (which was pretty overwhelming for her, but she loved it), or somewhere else not too far from home. She really WANTS to be more active, but she needs to take it easy a lot still.

My Mom came down to stay with her over the next week and half that I’m away. I would rather not be leaving without her feeling awesome, but she has progressed enough that we really do have a peace about my long planned Africa trip.

On to Africa

2008-01-18T11:37:00.001-06:00

Our long-time friends Kevin and Tonya Stanfield live in the area of Capetown, South Africa. They are full-time missionaries there, and primarily work in a township called Masiphumelele.

This is a crazy part of the world, as there is extreme hardship not too far from extreme wealth. The area where they spend most of their ministry time has a couple of incredible statistics:

90% unemployment

40% AIDS infected

Their work there is very intense, and I hope to gain a better understanding of what all they do while I’m in country. Kevin and I have talked for many years about me going to visit them on the mission field. In fact, this actually got planned (including plane ticket and dates) BEFORE we knew Marque was going to have her major surgery. So though I'm not excited about the timing, I still want to go...and Marque is downright insistent about it!!! What an awesome wife.

While I’m there I hope to see whatever God is purposefully showing me, and to be an encouragement to Kevin, Tonya, and their wonderful family (they have a 2 month old boy and a 7 year old girl too).

I leave this Sunday and plan to return on January 31.

Salvation

2008-01-10T21:18:00.001-06:00

Though we have not recalled a specific moment when Macye “became” a Christian, she has long held that Jesus is already “in her.”

However, this past Monday the 7^th at 7am, she came to breakfast and told me she needs to invite him inside her. Being over 5 now, she was pretty confident in what she was saying, and in expressing her need. She asked if I would help her, and me and the other kids bowed our heads and prayed with her as she prayed “the sinners prayer” and formally asked Jesus into her heart. Joy.

“Joshua 24:15b…as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD."

Marque still pretty exhausted

2008-01-10T21:12:00.000-06:00

Marque’s sinus infection has really slowed her down the past several days. She isn’t running a fever anymore, but her energy level is very spotty. The highlight of her past 3 days (energy wise), was me letting her drive the Mart-Cart at Sams! When she has bursts of energy, she is eager to get out of bed and do things. Today she vacuumed a few bedrooms, so though that is not a lot…it was something!

We continue to be thankful for the friends who are helping us in various ways...and for the prayers being sent up for Marque and our family.

Why Little Girls Rock

2008-01-04T19:32:00.000-06:00

Our kids are home now, but spent most of the past week in Iowa as Marque is still recovering. A couple of nights ago, my mom overheard them arguing. Apparently Payton was trying to pull his sleeves down from his upper arm, and Macye had decided to help. “No, I can do it myself!,” yelled Payton. Macye responded in a low-tone, “Do you want to marry me someday?” Payton said, “Yes.” Then Macye said, “Then you better change your attitude.”

Presidential Fun?

2008-01-04T19:28:00.000-06:00

For those of you following along, Mike Huckabee is Arkansas former governor, and he won the Iowa Republican Caucus.

Though I have not decided on my favorite candidate for President, I do like some things about Huckabee. However, my son John wishes that he had a vote, as he decided in a classroom discussion awhile back at school that he would vote for Huckabee.

With the kids being in Iowa most of the past week, they were exposed to unrelenting media advertisements about the Iowa Caucuses, and John got into it even more. Billboards, constant commercials on T.V., and multiple telephone interruptions have been par for Iowa residents as of late, and John ate it all up.

My Dad took John to Huckabee’s Victory party last night, and John got to hear the speech, shake hands, and briefly talk with Mr. Huckabee too! He was SO excited! John even got interviewed by a news crew out of Springfield, MO., so he felt very big time.

I thought that was cool and all, but then he told me that he also got to shake hands with CHUCK NORRIS, who has joined Huckabee's campaign hoopla! Now that was SUPER cool!

Marque a little sick too...

2008-01-04T19:25:00.000-06:00

Marque has been feeling particularly yuck the last few days, and has been running a low fever, so she went to the Doc today. Apparently she has a sinus infection! :(

Otherwise she is doing pretty good, and has been up more and more this week. It will be a couple more weeks before she can get out too much, but this was definately a better week for her.

Marque doing well and the unique upcoming month...AFRICA?

2008-01-01T14:40:00.000-06:00

Marque has been doing very well the past day or so, as she has really enjoyed having the house quiet as the kids are in Iowa having great fun in the snow at my parents house!

Marque is napping right now, but has come out of the room more in the past day then she has since returning from the hospital. This is mainly because it's easier to control sound and light when it is just the two of us. I will probably get the kids back here on Friday.

This next month will be very interesting for us, to say the least. Of course I will have some normal Exago duties, but additionally this January will be unique as I am:

· still nursing Marque back to health

· finishing up coaching the boys Upwards Basketball team which is currently playing awesome

· taking a personal mission trip to the country of South Africa on to minister with/to an Exago board member (Kevin Stanfield) and his family who are full-time missionaries there. They live near an extremely poor area by Capetown, called Masiphumelele.

This trip was planned and the plane ticket purchased before we knew Marque was going to be having surgery. Initially I assumed that I might need to cancel, but Marque’s health seems to be steadily progressing enough that she and I both sense a peace about me going through with it.

Additionally, Marque has family that live around us, and my mother is planning to come and stay with Marque and the kids while I am gone, or at least until her strength is back to 100%.

So...Lord willing...Marque's health will only improve over the next few weeks. If that happens, it appears I will go through with the trip afterall, from January 20th-31st.

Year 2007 Remembered

2008-01-01T14:18:00.000-06:00

In late January I took a whirlwind trip to meet up with many old friends and ministry partners from the Detroit and Chicago area who were influential on our lives and ministry direction. In Detroit I was able to reconnect with:

Komarras (my old youth pastor from when I was a wee lad, and his wonderful family)

John Shinn (my first Senior Pastor that I was a full-time Youth Pastor under)

Kevin Parkyn (the guy who essentially talked me down from the ledge of quitting ministry as a younger man trying to feed his family and do ministry at the same time…which I found is possible though hard!)

Jason Shinn (John’s son, one of my first committed volunteer youth leaders, and now himself a youth pastor)
The Nagel family (at one point when we were just starting out, their kids made up nearly half the youth group!)

Many wonderful young adults who USED to be kids in our youth group as kids and/or as adult leaders on our youth staff (which was incredible to hear their perspective on our time at Berean Bible so many years ago). I waited too long to type this, so I don’t remember who all came as I think Bethany Nagel invited most of Livonia and Canton…but in addition to the Nagels there were the Brady kids/adults, Josh Cruz, Allie Snell, Wendy Bono-Gardner, Meg-Han Shinn, and I spent the night at Brad and Mollie Reids house.

The trip continued back through Chicago where I spent an always too short time with not enough people! I LOVE CHICAGO-LAND, and have many dear friends and family there, but this was a quick trip so I absolutely jammed a lot into the couple of days I was in town. I got to see:

o Jenkins and Goodriches! Keith and Angee Jenkins are former neighbors, and Angee was my John’s 4 year old preschool teacher. The Goodriches who actually live in New York, and she is on the Exago Board of Directors…but they happened to be in town so the timing worked out wonderfully!

o the Moore-Frey family…Jef just keeps growing!

o ½ of the Nauman family

o Butzow family, who have since moved to Florida for the warm weather (smart people!)

o my favorite chain Italian restaurant, Maggianos…where I had dinner with my sister and her friend/boyfriend/fiancée?/pirate dude Joel Longshore

o Michelle Ritchie, Sabrina Nauman, Jen Versypt/whatsherlastnamenow? (at least I remember that her husband is Ben)…

o my good buds Jason Graham and Bob Young (who is on the Exago Board of Directors) and their AWESOMELY cool families. I got to attend church with them, and watch the Bears win the NFC before I had to hit the road to drive back to Arkansas.

On the way home I broke down in Springfield Missouri at about 1:00am…so I didn’t get home until late in the evening the following day. What a lousy ending to an otherwise great trip!

Truly though, it really was a great trip. Getting perspectives from both people who I had been ministered by, as well as from people I had ministered to, was great. Really, really great. I felt emboldened and encouraged about my previous years of ministry, but also with the future direction of building Exago. I am very thankful for that trip, as it was an excellent endeavor on all fronts.

February saw the end of Reagan’s basketball season, and quite a bit of growth in him in the process. In the first couple of games it looked like he might be a pretty good player, but he didn’t really stand out or anything. Then…WHAMMO…he figured out his jump shot and how to make a lay-up for his last 4 games. He went from making 1-2 baskets a game to well over 10, including spin-moves, up and under lay-ups, and long distance jumpers. As a parent, of course I was very proud of him. But as a basketball lover in general, it was just impressive to watch his on court maturation. Now again…he was only 7 and was playing against 7 year olds (some of which can’t even dribble) so he isn’t getting a scholarship or anything…but it was really cool to witness.

Payton turned 3 and Marque celebrated her birthday as well, so between birthdays and Valentines day, February was fun!

March brought baseball back in full-force, with both John and Reagan practicing regularly. One cool part was that John had a tournament in Tulsa, OK. This allowed for our whole family to travel the couple of hours over there, and to spend a night or two at Marque’s Grandma Engle’s house. Johns team (Redhawks) won the tournament, and the weather was nice enough that we had very pleasant time.

Marque also got to travel to Texas to see her long-time friend and former college roommate Molley Hoelzel-Goodson. Molly’s husband is a pastor in a country church quite a long ways from here, so we were able to scrape together enough funds to stick Marque on a plane. She isn’t the road warrior I am when it comes to driving, so this made the trip far more palatable for her. Molly has fought cancer in recent years, and of course Marque has had cyst on her brain…so it was good for them to reconnect during this serious health time.

While she was gone I spent quite a bit of time pulling old wallpaper off the kitchen walls, and painting the kitchen and bathroom ceiling. One particular night I didn’t get to sleep until 3am....which made me extra sleepy.

At about 6am in the same morning, Macye discreetly decided that she wanted to play with our neighbor’s daughter…quietly woke up Payton…and together went and unbolted and exited the front door… and rang the next door neighbors doorbell. The dad sent them right back home, and so they went into Macye’s room and closed the door. I was out cold, but only about 40 feet away…but didn’t hear them because they were just SOOOO quiet. I woke up moments later because our dog Comet was sitting on the front step barking, and of course the door was wide open. Of course I was very confused about what happened, and groggily interrogating a 3 and 4 year old didn’t explain a whole lot. Later I spoke with the neighbor before I pieced it all together.

I put a chain on the door that day which toddlers could not take off.

April brought more baseball, as Reagan has his first competitive travel tournament in Alma, AR which is about an hour from here. His team wasn’t too good, but for the most part he did an excellent job and had a lot of fun (which is the point!).

Also, April was kind of the beginning of “surveillance season.” As I do occasional insurance fraud investigations for my Dad’s company in order to supplement my limited ministry income, the late spring through the fall are prime times for surveillances. This works out great because I get A LOT of ministry work done on my pc and phone when I hit the road for a couple of days to do these jobs. I actually enjoy long drives, but am usually done with the assignment and back home within a few days.

May was probably one of the busiest months of the year. I felt like I was running from Exago, to baseball practice or games for John and Reagan, back to Exago and/or surveillance…with as much family time as possible mixed in to all of that. We also had been given season passes to the Silver Dollar City theme parks, so we took a day as family and had a good time up there.

A big highlight was when the entire family spent Memorial Day in Kansas City with Marque’s brother Todd and his family. This worked out perfectly as John’s baseball team was in a great baseball tournament there…though it rained quite a bit! We loved spending time with them both at the games and around K.C., and are hopeful to do the same this year.

June brought more baseball and traveling, capped off with another whirlwind trip through Chicago to officiate my cousin’s wedding. It was wonderful to see more of the Babyar clan mostly together, especially my sweet Grandma Mary (although she insists on calling me Pastor). Unfortunately Marque and the boys couldn’t come, but I did get to meet up with Reagan in Little Rock. After the wedding reception I drove straight through the night to meet up with him and his baseball team as they were playing in the state tournament. They played very well, and really showed improvement over the course of the year, so it was a great way to wrap up their season.

I also busted my foot on a water slide during the month, and had so many blood clots that I had to have surgery to remove them. The process actually made me quite sick as the foot got infected pre-surgery, but fortunately we know a good podiatrist who took care of me. Thanks Dr. Ayson!

July finally brought time to slow down a little and we met up with my parents and sister in Branson for a week at their time-share. I had so much fun with all of our family, but having extra vacation time to just play with our kids was a blessing. Macye is a fish! She spent as many waking moments in the swimming pool as we would allow. John couldn’t get enough ping-pong/pool, and Reagan was usually up for anything. He turned 8 while we were there, so it was a special birthday for him. Payton was just his normal, sweet, demanding, high-energy 3 year old self. Sometimes scared of the water, other times fearless…basically a 3 year old!
August brought a growing realization that Marque’s health was deteriorating, and we started to really consider the possibility she would need surgery on her head. I was busy with surveillances, but also realized that support raising is particularly hard in the later part of the summer, as getting people to return phone calls was increasingly hard! My friend (and author) Bill Stearns was good enough to sit down with me and explain that summer-time support raising is often slow for everyone, and that in reality we are ahead of the norms. This helped me feel A LOT better!
September was a major slow-down time for us as a family with the return of a normal school schedule, and no sports for the older boys. Macye turned 5, and she began ballet and tumbling classes, which she has thoroughly enjoyed. Unfortunately Marque began spending more and more time in bed with sever migraines. We made a special trip to Little Rock to meet with a Neurosurgeon who confirmed that Marque’s tumor/cyst needed to be drained and removed because it was pressing against her cerebellum. Whoa.
October allowed for Marque and I to attend Dave Ramsey’s EntreLeadership training conference in Nashville. Actually, I did most of the attending, and Marque did a lot of needed resting. This was a good little trip, as it allowed her to be kid-free for a couple of days. We LOVE our kids passionately…and love spending lots of time with them…but getting a few days together without them around was a huge blessing for us.

It also was an encouraging time for me professionally in building Exago. There is a lot to starting any business, but particularly to a non-profit business like Exago. It takes a lot of entrepreneurial vision and leadership, and it was affirming to receive training and encouragement about our direction.

November was preparation time for the following couple of months, as we were beginning to stare Marque’s big surgery in the face. Plus we needed to do out Christmas preparations early, plus John’s 10^th birthday stuff, Thanksgiving, and the cooking and sending of care packages to Exago supporters. It was a full-month!
December was John’s birthday, and the boys basketball picked up. They have really enjoyed playing on the same team this year, and have won all of their games in Upwards Basketball so far...with both of them contributing heavily. Of course, December was also brain surgery time. We really sensed and felt an outpouring of God’s grace, and the love and support of many people who sent cards/letters/flowers/$/blog comments/incredible amounts of food….and it was SO VERY APPRECIATED. One of Marque’s first times out of bed was on Christmas Eve when we attended a service at church. This was a blessing, even though the noise and lights were a bit overwhelming for her and I had to take her home early. Fortunately my parents/Kristen/Joel were around to help with the kids. In fact my mom pretty much lived here for the final 2 weeks of month!

We ended the month with dinner at Marque’s parents ministry, and then a quiet evening with a movie. Surprise surprise…Marque actually stayed awake until a few minutes into the New Year!

I felt like 2007 was on of our more challenging but blessed years. I left out a lot (like spraining my ankle and knee playing basketball!), but I think I hit many of the more important events and travels of the year. We have a wonderful family, and are so thankful for God's love and guidance.

May we love, worship, and honor him even more with our lives in 2008.

Irritable Headache Persists

2007-12-27T15:45:00.000-06:00

Marque has had a rougher couple of days, as her pain in her head has throbbed pretty hard. She hasn't been out of bed much, but she did get to see Karen Olsen and boys who dropped off a meal for us. Homemade pizza, yummy!

We have been VERY blessed with people bringing food and offering to bring food, so we are set in that arena for awhile. I'm really not much of a cook, but I'm a wiz with warming things up! Thank you Lord for these people blessing us!

Also, we were blessed to finally have some insurance coverage things seem to finally have worked out (allegedly). A few things still need to be organized, but we were notified that all the roadblocks holding back her coverage previously have been removed. Several people have been praying about that, and it has been a relief to know things are seeming to work out.

My parents have been here for the better part of 2 weeks now, and they rented a room at a nearby hotel the past few nights as my sister and her boyfriend/fiancee/pirate/youthleader dude Joel came in from Chicago for Christmas.

However, my parents headed home this morning, and Joel/Kristen are going to go visit them (and take the kids!) this weekend. I will probably meet my parents in KC next mid-week to get the kids back home. So this means that it will be just Marque and I for a few days come Saturday...

Slow progress

2007-12-23T11:26:00.000-06:00

Our littlest two decided they wanted to play around Mommy for a little while after church this morning.

Marque has been feeling pretty good lately on the whole. She needs more rest than she wants, but that is a good sign. We have ventured to take her out from the house BRIEFLY a couple of times, including for a a late evening dessert with relatives at her Mom and Dad's new house in Little Flock.

My parents are here for Christmas also, so they are helping out a ton still, and my sister is coming down later tonight or tomorrow also.

Marque still has headaches from the surgery, and one of her medicines make her a bit shaky. She cames to be "shakin' like a polaroid picshu" However, she needs that medicine to prevent post-op seizures, so it's part of the deal for now.

Home !!!

2007-12-19T16:07:00.000-06:00

Marque still has a journey towards recovery in front of her, but she is home! PRAISE GOD!

Home?

2007-12-19T09:46:00.000-06:00

Rumor has it that they will try and take out Marque's stitches, her last remaining "lines" in her shoulder, and that I can take her home today!!!

This is a busy hospital wing, so we aren't holding our breath that she will be discharged too soon. However, it would be wonderful if all goes well and they let her travel home!

As it is an approximate 3 hour drive home, we will need to break it up with a stop or two along the way.

More good news: Though she will be limited for awhile, the Doc said that she CAN wash her hair about 24 hours after stitches removal! This seemed to brighten her spirit quite a bit!

Currently she is resting, and I'm thinking about going home and shooting hoops with my boys tomorrow. I've missed doing that this week.

For those of you who haven't seen John and Reagan play basketball, you are missing out on quite a treat. Maybe I should stick a video of them on here sometime. They are on a couple different teams together, and really have a nose for the ball on offense and defense. They both personally outscored the entire other team they were playing in their last game! Now I have to teach them the value of an "assist."

More Thanks

2007-12-19T09:31:00.000-06:00

We are still so very thankful for everyone that has sent cards, gifts, text messages, emails, blog comments, etc. Your personal messages and prayers have been an encouragement. I've not had time to respond to hardly any of them personally, but that doesn't mean we don't appreciate them. THANK YOU!

There were also some very special people from Iowa who sent along some $ when my parents came down last week. To give you an example of how those funds have been used: I figured out pretty quick that eating in the hospital cafeteria was NOT free, especially 3 times a day! Having some extra $ along to help with those type of those expenses has been SO helpful.

Thank you also to Stubbs who sent flowers to Marque's room. In total Marque has had 4 flower deliveries, so it smells much better in her room than in the rest of the hospital!

Thank you to our parents as well, as they have been wonderful in helping with the big things and the small!

I'd thank the chair I've been sleeping on this week, but I'm really not it's greatest fan at this point. I'm ready for a bed again. ;)

Greatest Prescription...EVER

2007-12-18T15:22:00.001-06:00

I'm not jealous much, I just feel so blessed most of the time that I can't really complain.

However...Marque's doc told her she needs to drink a lot of caffeine to help with the headaches and healing. Then he specifically gave examples: Coffee AND Mt. Dew.

Wow. Not that I want surgery on my head, but I can't think of a much better phrase to come out of a Doc's mouth. Perhaps I was a Youth Pastor for too long (better part of 13 years), but I still love my Mt. Dew!!!

Guess I'll need to share. :)

The Last 4 hours

2007-12-18T15:11:00.001-06:00

Marque has really perked up even more since late morning, including going on an even longer walk by herself! The negative is that her pain scale hasn't gotten better than a 5 yet. The positive is that she is spending more and more time at 5 then at the worser numbers.

We are really missing our kids at this point, and are hoping to come home Wednesday or Thursday at the latest.

The discharge people came by to go over some things, and they basically told her she isn't allowed to have a life for about 6-weeks. No driving, no washing her hair, no para-gliding, deep sea diving, etc.

Good Night, Poor Morning

2007-12-18T10:01:00.000-06:00

Last afternoon/night went really well. Marque ate Subway (I spoilt her!) and some JellyBellys. She was able to speak on the phone with 3 of our kids too! She also got out of bed 2 more times for short walks.

Before she went to sleep at 8:30pm, we watched another episode of bionic woman. Marque has had 4 surgeries in the past few years, show she has joked on several occasions that she is on her way to being bionic.

NBC's website lets you watch back episodes of many of their shows, and that has come in real handy. As I have my work laptop here, we have been able to watch an episode each evening of the New Bionic Woman that we had not seen before, but probably originally aired over a month or two ago.

We both remember watching the old show as kids. The new one is definately different. At times it has a bit of a jagged story line that doesn't really makes sense. Other times it's kind of good, almost like the show "Alias" was before they went and ruined it with different writers and too many bizarre plot twists. Anyway, it has been a nice diversion that we can do together.

She awakend for a little while around 11, but then pretty much slept through the night...which is progress!

This morning she woke up with a 7 on the pain scale, and hasn't really bounced back yet. She ate a biscuit and has been cat napping ever since.

My Lovely and Her Scar

2007-12-17T15:45:00.001-06:00

I promise...she told me I should put these pics on the blog...I'm as surprised as you are. Yes that is the back of her head. It appears to be healing really well. She said it still feels "squishy," but I tell her that it's all in her head. ;) What you can't see is that is not as bald as the bright light makes it appear. She will probably have a good amount of hair there, meaning most of us will never notice the scar.

She went on another short walk a couple hours ago. It left her head throbbing, but the pain level didn't increase which is very good news. Her pain level has never gotten lower than a 5...yet. But she spends more time at a 5 or 6 than she does at an 8/9, thank God. Seriously. The wonders of modern medical science are an amazing blessing.

Right now she hasn't had any morphine in about 4 hours, so the pain is starting to build. Almost time for another dose.

Some Relief

2007-12-17T12:05:00.000-06:00

Marque's new nurse seems to have her act together, and got her straightened out with some good meds that allowed her rest.

After sleeping for an hour or two, she woke up for awhile and seemed pretty peppy. She watched TLCs What Not to Wear and had a good giggle or too, then she actually got up and walked about 50 feet down the hall, and back.

That wiped her out pretty good again, but it's progress.2 steps forward 1 step back seems to be the theme for the last 24 hours.

Bad Pain update

2007-12-17T09:11:00.000-06:00

The nurse finally came in, apologetically. She seemed pretty miffed at the doc, but didn't put it in those words. She brought some morphine, and I think Marque is resting okay now.

Her pain was at an 8 on the 1-10 scale. Ouch.

Thanks all that continue to check this blog and pray for her!

Bad Pain

2007-12-17T08:39:00.000-06:00

Marque had a bad night, and is still in a lot of pain this morning. Unfortunately the on-call docs and new nurse (I think there was a shift change in the night) have not offered much help.

More than anything else I want to remain thankful, but it is very frustrating at the moment. A doc stopped by 2 hours ago to talk with her, just as she was in the restroom. He wouldn't wait the 2 minutes for her to come out, and just left, saying he would be back. He has not returned.

She is in a lot of pain! I'm starting to stir things up for some attention around here.

Lord, please grant Marque rest and relief. And please get those who could help her to step up!

Resting Well

2007-12-16T20:54:00.000-06:00

Marque had a really good afternoon after she napped. She didn't even need to put the eye patch on the other eye, as she awakened seeing a little clearer.

She did just a bit of reading, watched some tv, and ate a decent amount of food for dinner. Her pain level dropped to about a 5 for awhile there which is about the best she has felt since we arrived.

However, all that energy output took it out of her, and her headache got kind of a sharp edge to it. She took some pain killers and went to sleep about 7:30...and I think she may be done for the night (either that or she is going to be wide awake at 4am!).

1030pm update
Right after I finished the earlier part of this post...she awakened feeling a little better! She was alert enough to sit and be able to read some of the blog for a few minutes, as well as we watched a short tv episode online.
The "edge" of the headache is back now though, and she is laying down. The nurse should be here soon with some more pain killers to help her rest.

Double-Vison

2007-12-16T11:48:00.001-06:00

Marque is sitting up for the first time in chair for just a little bit. This is per request from the Doc. It doesn't make her headache pain feel any better, but it's good for her to have movement.

Also, she has an eye patch on. They will leave it there for a couple of hours and then switch it to the other side. The goal here is to help her vision clear up (she has been seeing double).

Whew...that was close!

2007-12-15T20:24:00.000-06:00

Marque is allergic to a few things, and it is in her chart...but something didn't get transitioned right and they almost gave her some Percoset. Thankfully Marque noticed the error just in time...or she would have ended up in the E.R. or something! Whew!

Marque is finally awake enough to look at the goodie bag she got from our Community Group, and eat a few pieces of candy. First time she has been awake longer than 10 minutes since before the surgery.

She's even watching TV and currently checking out motivational speaker Matt Foley (that's him above).

Thanks for the Flowers!

2007-12-15T15:38:00.000-06:00

Marque's room just got a whole lot prettier, as some flowers were delivered!

She received some from from my sister Kristen, and her wonderful friend/boyfriend/fiancee?/pirate/missionary/buddy/dude Joel. She is a gifted music teacher, and he is a gifted leader in youth ministry in the Elgin area of Chicagoland.

At the same time, some flowers were delivered from the Holloways (friends from our Community Group in Northwest Arkansas).

She is pretty much sleeping her day away, but that is what she needs. She happened to be awake when the flowers arrived though, so that was great timing!

Day 3

2007-12-15T11:49:00.000-06:00

Marque is still not feeling very good, and sleeps most of the time. The pain in her head is just too strong. She did finally wake up long enough to eat a biscuit and drink some juice, but then she quickly headed off to sleep.

Her Doc just stopped by and said to not rush her getting out of bed if she doesn't want too. I had raised her bed a little into a sitting position earlier (per her request) and her head pounded with pain, so back down she went.

Our kids have sent some messages via Instant Messenger, and I have tried to read those to her when she was awake. Some even tried to call her phone earlier, but she won't be chatting for a couple of days yet.

Doc says that he will try and send her home Monday or Tuesday if she is feeling better. He said it will take awhile for the pain to wear off because of where they had to enter her head. But he also warned that if her headache doesn't go away within a few weeks, all options are back on the table to try and give her comfort.

The goal of all of this this pain and discomfort, is to get her to a place where she can once again function in daily life without regular pain and discomfort!

Late Night With Nurses

2007-12-14T20:49:00.000-06:00

I will be staying with her in her private room, and sleeping in a dingier version of the above chair. If that doesn't work, I know where there is an extra cot sitting out in a hallway for most of the day.

We are very blessed to finally be in the private room. It took over 2 hours for them to get someone up here to clean it, but I guess that just shows how busy and behind schedule the hospital is. Still...no complaints...they are taking care of every need eventually. :)

The nurses really are on top of Marque's needs, so we are VERY thankful. Her nurse just got permission to give her an extra darvocet since she is in such pain still.

I think I should try and rest now too, since she will be probably be still for a couple of hours now.

Finally Together Again

2007-12-14T17:16:00.001-06:00

Marque was moved to a room finally! At the moment she is having to share with a chatty lady who is talking to 2 friends present as well as she has been on the phone near constantly over the past 45 minutes or so that we have been in here. I think they are trying to talk quietly though, so they aren't being completely insensitive.

However, I requested....and the Doc wrote an order...for Marque to be moved to a private room as soon as one is vacated. The nursing staff informed me that she will be in WING 2A, ROOM 214 as soon as they can move her. I walked by it and the last patient is already gone and they are cleaning it at the moment.

Please DO NOT call her room. We are going to keep it as quiet as possible for the next day or two as she regains strength (and prayerfully her headache pain will dissipate).

Afternoon visit -thanks for comments/prayers

2007-12-14T14:13:00.000-06:00

At about 1pm I was able to spend about 20 minutes with her before they kicked me out this time. There are a lot of really messed up patients back in there with a variety of ailments. It's pretty sad. There are about 20 beds in the large room she is sharing, but her bed is semi-isolated so that is a blessing.

Marque's pain is about a 6 on a scale of 1-10. She varied between an 8 and a 10 last night, so though she is not very comfortable, it is an improvement! They have been keeping a cold compress on the back of her head to try and reduce swelling, and she still has bunch of "lines" in her. It's amazing how beautiful she looks despite all the medical junk attached to her!

I fed her a small cup of jello, and read her some of the text messages and comments left on the blog! She really seemed to appreciate hearing personal comments and prayers from people!

Comments left on the blog are probably best because they will be there for awhile and not lost amidst other text messages and emails. Even if you sent me me a message through other means, I wouldn't mind if you posted into a blog comment so that Marque can more easily see it later. At some point I plan to let her view the blog once she is able to sit up in bed and read, though that may be a couple days away.

Her nurse told me that they plan to get her into a room this afternoon. I will update later with a room number for anyone wanting to send flowers.

This morning

2007-12-14T11:06:00.000-06:00

We got to see Marque for a few minutes this morning, and she seemed to be doing better though still in quite a bit of pain. She actually smiled a little, and was able to talk just a bit. In entertained her with my "true" story from last night with the HAND MAN.

Am praying that:

God will grant her increase freedom from terrible headache
They will be able to get her a room soon where I can spend more time with her (still stuck in Operating Recovery area due to hospital overflow)
The mountain of red-tape details with medicaid will continue to show improvement, and that our approval this time around won't be stopped by another last second denial

I'm actually sitting in the hospital medicaid office at the moment, and am trying to get all details in order as they are being unusually helpful! Praise God.

I get to see her again at 1pm if nothing changes.

Marque's parents have headed to Tulsa to rescue Marque's Grandma from the ice storm that has left her with no power and a depleted food supply...so praying for them too!

A BIT OFF SUBJECT…AND A BIT “OFF” IN GENERAL…BUT ALL TRUE

2007-12-13T22:20:00.000-06:00

ACT I

At about 6:30pm this evening, an unsavory looking adult male approached me as I and 4 female strangers waited to board an elevator here at UAMS. He smelled. He appeared to be a little off his rocker mentally. I believe perhaps he had been smoking a bit of wacky tobaccy if you catch my drift.

He tapped me on the shoulder, pulled out what appeared to be a pharmacy prescription, and showed it to me. He claimed to not have enough money to fill it, and informed me that he was only a couple dollars short. In slurred speech, he then asked me for some of my personal monetary assistance. He claimed that he needed these drugs to help him get over his bronchitis. Those of you who know me well, know that these sort of things…just…happen to me sometimes. I seem to attract these sorts of situations, even though I know they are crazy from the first second. So, yes, my stupid-radar was going off loudly in my head, and I didn’t totally believe this guy.

The “Chicago” in me was about ready to dismiss and ignore him, but I really try not to be so callous about people having needs. I believe strongly in grace, so sometimes I try and practice it for God’s glory, even when it isn’t “logical and sensible.”

I said a quick silent prayer and thought for a second about what I felt like God actually wanted me to do this time, and in this situation. I also reasoned that this guy appeared to be headed towards the cafeteria with the rest of us waiting to go down. Plus he didn’t look like he could easily walk to a liquor store, and that he certainly didn’t look healthy anyway. I hoped that he might…just might…maybe…actually need some medicine not related to Jack Daniels. I felt like I should honor his request.

As I pulled my wallet out of my pocket, and my tiny wad of cash that totaled 9 whole dollars (1 $5 bill and 4 $1 bills), his request changed. Of course. He suddenly remembered that he thought he might need $3 instead of $2.

That over-tested my grace quotient, and set off a whole bunch of additional alarms. He got $2.

ACT II

A few seconds later the elevator arrived. Myself and the 4 ladies got on, but my new friend must have decided to also hit-up someone else walking by for cash, as he was temporarily delayed in joining us. As the door closed, one of the ladies in the elevator with a better view then mine suddenly gasped and said, “Oh did he put his hand in there?”

About the time she finished uttering this half under her breath, we started to hear a distant sounding screaming. And shouts. But the sounds were coming through metal, so they were very muffled and not very clear. They sounded something like, “Ubenthdmdoor!,” and “itstukUbenthdoor! Mihandstuk,Ubenthdmdor!” Several much louder curse words began to pierce through the metal doors, and we all began to realize that there was a reason the elevator wasn’t moving.

You probably already guessed it. Yes….our elevator was stuck only because my new friend had made a choice. A very poor choice indeed. He had chosen to stick his hand in the door at the last second so that he might join us on our ride to the cafeteria floor. Instead, his hand had become completely stuck in the closed elevator door.

The lady beside me began to frantically push the OPEN DOOR button, but nothing happened. Another lady looked like she was going into shock. The third lady started to show signs of onset hyperventilation. The 4th lady who was behind me started giggling quietly, and I have to admit I was feeling a bit twilight-zoneish because of my personal response in wierd situations. This would make a good whole different blog entry sometime, but when a situation gets stressful such as this, something in my head seems to slow everything down. I hear and notice nearly everything, and then my personality typically takes over the situation and does damage control. A lot of people have a kind of freak out fight or flight reaction…my reaction is typically deliberate and logical. Meanwhile, my compassion meter had started to run low for this guy when he had asked for the extra buck, so I was also trying not to giggle.

This went on for about 10 seconds before I realized that no amount of button pushing was going to get this guy’s hand out, and that he was completely incapable of freeing it himself. I can only imagine that his bronchitis had sapped his strength. ;)

About this time, I noticed a slight crevice in the closed door. And so, in not very gallant fashion, I stuck both of my hands into the gap and forcibly opened the door

There stood my new friend with an awfully large impression/mark/indentation across his palm, though no blood. Additionally, he now had an even crazier look in his eye then when I had just met him a couple minutes before. 3 doctors and a cop were surrounding him, questioning him, checking out his hand, but he was ignoring them. He would look at me. Then he would look at his hand. Then stare at me. Then look at and rub his hand. He had completely stopped yelling/swearing, but now he was dumbfounded, and I have to stress that his hand really didn’t look so great.

Meanwhile I noticed that our elevator was now officially out of commission, and would not be working again anytime soon. So I led my merry gentlewomen to a different elevator, all the while assuring them that this next ride would be less exciting. We exited that 2nd elevator laughing, as we then split up to find our own cuisine in the wonderworld known as the hospital cafeteria.

ACT III

As I was eating, my in-laws (David and Beverley) returned to the hospital from running some earlier errands. They had no idea what I had just encountered, but they had heard some talk in the hall about the cops coming and dealing with some guy, and engineering being called, and just little snippets that alerted them something was up.

As they approached the elevators, David had overheard a hospital worker from the engineering department talking with another worker, and the two of them were standing by a broken elevator with the door stuck partially open. To paraphrase, he heard the engineer disgustingly say, “…and then some guy on the inside just jerked this door open and bent that, and now look what he has done. How am I supposed to fix something like this?”

A few minutes later I met up with David and Beverley in the waiting room as I returned from the cafeteria. He mentioned something about wondering what all that commotion he missed had been about. I inquired what he was talking about, and then was able to answer his question with much more detail then he expected.

Just now…as I was finishing writing this up, the police officer from before stopped by where I’m sitting and talked with me for a few minutes. He said that they wouldn't have been able to have freed that guy out from the outside, as they had 3 guys pulling and but the elevator door wouldn't budge from that angle. He also said, “I see a lot of crazy things working in a hospital, but I’ve never seen anyone get their hand stuck in an elevator before. There is a laser that is supposed to keep that from happening, but he must have been just dumb enough to jam his hand in there at the last instant.”

We laughed. He thanked me for helping. I said no problem. We said goodnight.

True.

Saw Her Again

2007-12-13T20:48:00.000-06:00

Was able to spend a few more minutes with Marque this time around, and she was a lot more alert. Unfortunately she is in a LOT of pain, and she is allergic to most of the pain medicines they give to Neuro patients. The did and extra CT scan around 7 to be sure that there wasn't anything funky going on inside her head and I guess everything was okay.

However, she hurts. Seems like most of the things Marque can take are bad for her right now. I did talk with a nurse, and got her to ask some more docs, and they finally gave her some more morphine.

I'm afraid she is going to have a long night, and the room is officially closed to all visitors now. I was able to weasel my 10 minute visit into about 30 though, and I could tell that it meant a lot to her to have me stick around a bit longer.

Visitation begins again at 9am. I was going to just wait for her in the waiting room, but Marque's parents talked me into going back to the hotel since I can't go see her anyway. The nurse assured me that she should sleep now, and that she is stable.

Saw Her!

2007-12-13T17:14:00.000-06:00

I got to see her for about 5 minutes at 5pm. She is heavily sedated, and barely woke up long enough to squeeze my hand once I was in...but hey that was something!

She looked beautiful, and I prayed over her as I realize she is still in a great deal of pain. She can have another brief visit at 8pm, but I will probably let her parents go this next time (supposedly they only allow 2 people at a time, but if there is a way around that I will find it and slip in again).

Meanwhile, one of the nurses confirmed to me that the hospital is so full that there are 11 patients being held over in ICU that could be moved to regular rooms if there was space available...but there isn't. This is a busy place!

and waiting...and waiting...

2007-12-13T15:57:00.000-06:00

As of about 20 minutes ago, I still had not heard anything else, and I have not been able to see her yet. So I intentionally became a pleasant pest at the nurse's station, and did a bit of pushing until they picked up a phone and made some inquiries.

Unfortunately Marque is in a lot of pain in the recovery room, and at the time they were ordering more meds. On top of that, they are back-logged in how many and how soon they are allowing people into the recovery area. The people sitting near me have a relative who also just came out of surgery, but they are having to keep her in the operating room because there is no room in the recovery room.

Rumor is that there were a couple of big car wrecks and a couple of shootings in Little Rock last night, so extra surgeries have made the staff here very busy and behind their planned schedules today.

They told me that it is unlikely that I will be able to see her before 5pm, and maybe even not yet then. :(

Lord, please grant Marque the peace of your Spirit, and allow her body to rest and not be taxed with pain. Please guide the minds and decisions of her caregivers for her and those also in need. Thank you for your grace and peace.

Waiting...

2007-12-13T14:34:00.001-06:00

Still no word from the recovery room, so hopefully that means she is just waking up slowly. Will be sure to update ASAP for you prayer warriors out there.

You are a blessing for lifting up my beloved and our family through this time.

OUT OF SURGERY

2007-12-13T13:09:00.000-06:00

The Doc just came and spoke with us and she did GREAT! They were able to remove the cyst and it's membranes, and she is in recovery.
PRAISE GOD!

I probably get to see her in about an hour.

:)

Her flowers are delivered here...or there...or somewhere

2007-12-13T12:29:00.000-06:00

I just got a message via email on my phone that Marque's flowers I sent have been delivered. On one hand that is great...however, since she is still in surgery, where they are I don't know.
We just received an update at about noon that all is going well. Praise God!

In Surgery Now

2007-12-13T10:19:00.000-06:00

We finished up with Marque's Pre-Op a little while ago, and they explained that she will be having multiple "lines" put in:

her normal I.V.
a line to her heart to monitor any extra oxygen that is not supposed to be getting in and causing extra problems
an arterial line in her her arm (I think is to monitor her blood pressure).

They are going to shave some of the back of her head and then cut a little flap which they hope can easily be stitched after the surgery. The Doc also came in and explained they he is planning to try and remove the cyst, not just drain it, because otherwise the sack could potentially refill. Whoa.

Marque's parents are here as well, which I think that was very comforting for Marque. If you don't know them, they run a couple of great ministries (David and Beverly Engle http://www.restorationvillage.net/index.html http://www.cherishingchildren.net ). They were great to meet us in Little Rock last night and take us to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, Pei Wei. If you have never had their Edamame you are missing out.

Anyway, Marque is supposed to be in surgery for another hour or two, and then they will move her to Intensive Care for the first day or so. Allegedly I'm not allowed to stay with her tonight, but we'll see how long I can skirt around that rule or not. I'm thinking that since I'm family AND and a liscensed Pastor by the State of Arkansas...I should be able to stay with her 24/7...right? Yeah I doubt they will buy that one.

Lord, please guide the hands of the Docs and nurses that are operating on Marque! We are always dependent on you, but at times like these we recognize and feel our total dependancy!

At The Hospital

2007-12-13T07:34:00.000-06:00

We are here at the University of Arkansas Medical Sciences hospital, and Marque is doing Pre-Op. As this is a teaching hospital, there are a LOT of young Docs roaming the halls. A whole troop of them walked past us about 10 minutes ago, and an elderly lady near us said "Here comes Grey's Anatomy."
Marque likes that show (I find it torturous), so we both got a kick out of that spot-on comment.

Some special time, and flowers

2007-12-11T21:11:00.000-06:00

Wow...we're a bit surprised that it is finally almost here. My parents arrived last night as they will be staying with our kids for awhile.

We had a very special date with each other this afternoon. We wrapped up some Christmas shopping, and had a long intimate lunch before seeing a movie. Afterwards we came home and Marque helped the boys with some school projects and watched a Christmas show with the kids.

Tomorrow we will drive down to Little Rock. It's about 3 hours away, and we haven't been given a confirmed time for the surgery on Thursday yet, so we feel it best to head on down after doing a BIRTHDAY breakfast with John, who turns 10 tomorrow!

I just got done ordering her flowers in advance. If anyone else is interested in sending flowers I have heard that ProFlowers.com is the way to go. If you are wanting to send her some flowers you can send it through their website. The address of the hospital is:
UAMS
4301 W. Markham St., Little Rock, AR 72205

Marque's Upcoming Surgery

2007-11-27T11:50:00.000-06:00

Many of you are aware that my wife has been battling various health problems for a few years now. However, her biggest challenge appears to be yet in front of us.

A specialist from the UofA hospitals in Little Rock called recently to confirm that Marque’s cyst is pressing on her cerebellum in a way that requires surgery. They will need to make an incision at the base of her head and then carefully “poke holes” in the cyst, in an attempt to drain it. Apparently how/where the fluid drains is critical, though we don’t pretend to understand all of the dynamics of it. The surgeon’s belief is that this operation will dramatically help to relieve the pressure in her head which has been causing her debilitating pain and headaches.

Marque was instructed to prepare for surgery on December 13 in Little Rock. He expects her to be in the hospital for at least 4-7 days, and completely inactive for at least a couple of weeks afterwards.

After we found out about the surgery details and date, Marque believes God took her to the following prayer/verse that King David wrote to God in a time of difficulty:

“You, who have shown me great and severe troubles, shall revive me again, and bring me up again from the depths of the earth. You shall increase my greatness, and comfort me on every side.” Psalm 71:20-21

Thank you so much for your support and prayers! Please continue to lift up Marque, our family, and the medical team performing the surgery!

In His Peace,

Aaron

PS Several people have recently requested that we keep them updated on Marque's health progress. But getting everyone's email address just right is a huge pain...so this blog will be the PRIMARY avenue of communication regarding her health...and will continue to be so following the surgery.

So basically, you can check back here to get updates and comment/send prayers/etc, particularly leading up to and following the surgery.

TOP 10 Reasons I'm a Bad Blogger

2007-08-16T20:57:00.000-05:00

#10 I have a GREAT memory.
the truth: Though I would clean up if i ever ended up on that dorky "Singing Bee" game show, I need PDA for my calendar and to do list...so a blog of my personal history wouldn't hurt me in the long run
#9 I'm too busy.
the truth: I've got a beautiful but ailing wife, 4 kids, a dog, 2 jobs, and Sallie Mae is STILL living in my house. Who has time? BUT...being too busy is never really a good excuse for anything. Either it is important enough, or it isn't. I hate lame excuses, even my own.
#8 I hate the computer.
the truth: Ummm...that is just a lie.
#7 Interruptions.
the truth: ok, this is legit. seriously, between #8 and #7 I put two kids to bed, fed the dog, and got a drink. when you have a big family this sort of commitment can span a few days.
#6 No one reads this blog but my Mom
the truth: actually, I'm not sure how true this actually is or isn't. I'm so inconsistent with blogging, and am fairly cut off from our old "The Grove" friends since we relocated our Sundays to Rogers/Lowell. A friend of ours moved to Colorado recently and didn't even call to say goodbye...and she was one of our favorite babysitters!
Yet when I do blog, it's really more for me and maybe/hopefully/eventually for my wife and kids. However, if you are the rare soul who are visiting, thank for commenting and making me feel important today (NOT YOU MOM)
#5 Technology changes.
the truth: seriously, I can't keep up. I realize that I don't blog enough, but the last few times I have tried to actually post, blogspot has had some sort of change which required me to jump through some new passoword snafu, or my PDA picture phone died and the new one isn't set up to send automattically to my blog, or something else crazy like that. When I'm actually in the mood to blog, I need it to work! I need Cialis for my blog (wow that was random).
#4 My Creativity comes and goes.
the truth: it would probably do me good to be intentional about writing regularly, but I am a SLOW writer. I get bored trying to keep up with my own brain, which means I'm bound to get off subject rather quickly. How about them Bears!
#3 Our bedroom is our office.
the truth: sometimes people need to sleep, including my beautiful wife. This is a good deterrent from me being on the computer late into the night working on Exago or blogging...the rat-ta-tat-tat of the keyboard does not a good sleeper make!
#2 Sometimes blogging seems like work.
the truth: actually, that is the truth. and since I already work countless hours for Exago each week, plus occasionally do surveillances for my Dad's P.I. company...work gets old...and since blogging doesn't pay the bills...CHECK PLEASE
#1 It's more fun to read Marque's blog then it is to read or write my own.
the truth: I mean, come on...I already know what I'm thinking! Now if I could just get her to be the good blogger in our family...

My girl!

2007-03-03T18:46:00.001-06:00

Macye was a combo princess/fairy/bug with boots today. This is such a fun "dress up" season of life for her (and us).

Our dog Comet

2007-03-02T20:43:00.001-06:00

He has a pretty smile!

Not to PhD...at least not yet

2007-02-15T11:55:00.000-06:00

Updating a blog from March 3rd of LAST year, I am not staring Ph.D. work at this time despite my desire to do so.

Here is an excerpt from a recent email I sent to the Doctoral Program Coordinator, who contacted me in January, inquiring if I would accept their invitation for beginning this Spring:

Though I strongly desire the education I would receive from doing this Ph.D., and though I am still honored at SBTS inviting and holding a place for me…it would not be wise for me to proceed at this time. I have begun a new ministry direction, we are still adjusting to some family health issues, and I simply do not see these circumstances settling down a bit until later in 2007…which would allow me time to focus on formal studies in addition to my normal ministry duties.

If I may once again defer my enrollment until 2008, there is a far greater likelihood that I could begin this task. Otherwise it is my understanding is that this effectively eliminates me from enrollment and I will need to reapply should I desire to attend SBTS in the future. Please advise.

In His Grace,

Aaron J. Babyar

I sent this two weeks ago and have not been replied too. I hope they weren't offended, but I think I have pretty good reasons!

Love my Payton

2007-02-13T10:12:00.000-06:00

This my friend Justin.

2007-02-12T14:45:00.001-06:00

I hardly see him anymore. His blog is rockstarjones.blogspot.com. He's cool.

Same foot different angle

2007-02-10T22:11:00.001-06:00

Note the pretty reds and purples? Note the pretty balloon-like swelling? Rumor has it that this isn't a good sign. Is it just me, or can you never get enough good foot pix on a blog?

But the Doc says...

2007-02-10T22:08:00.001-06:00

Ran into a podiatrist friend tonight, and she had me take off the brace to see the sprain. She is pretty sure I didn't break anything, but blew out a couple ligaments pretty bad. No running or basketball for around 6 weeks. Grrrrrr for me. But very nice to have a podiatrist friend who will stop me from doing more permanent damage.

Ouch

2007-02-09T20:50:00.000-06:00

I've been doing a little exercising lately in an attempt to get my mad basketball "hops" back. My long stated goal of dunking on my 40th birthday will otherwise be in jeopardy.

This week was my best effort to date...I ran 2x and I played basketball 2x. Unforunately today's lunchtime games ended with me being injured. I took off to block a potential game winning shot...and the shooter and I got tangled with both of our weights coiming down on my sideways turned ankle. I rolled it. Fire and numbness ensued.

So I iced it for 3 hours and got a compression wrap on it (I actually drove a handicap cart around Sam's looking for the compression wraps!)...and it's feeling a little better.

I might be dreaming, but I hope to run again Monday. :-O Thank God for ibuprofrin.

Teaching today

2007-01-29T07:28:00.001-06:00

My friend Dan Lambert is in Russia with his family right now, adopting a 10 year old orphan. I'm taking his Youth Ministry classes today, which will be the first time I've been "the prof" since last April. Should be fun.

Me and My sis

2007-01-28T22:01:00.001-06:00

Woodfield Starbucks....January 07

It's been awhile....

2007-01-27T18:25:00.000-06:00

For some reason, sometime awhile back blogging became not only tedious...but passe. I didn't give it up because I didn't think it it was cool (you self proclaimed cool people know whom I'm talking about)...but because life just seemed to get in the way and I kind of left it for dead.

However...I very much like blogging despite the ball and chain feel it can cause when you go through IHBRA....which I think should be diagnosed as medical condition standing for "i haven't blogged recently anxiety."

Here is a VERY short list of life's craziness since my last real post:

I was invited to do my Ph.D. formally...but declined because of Marque's health and pending ministry/life changes I could see in our future
I helped coach John and Reagans basketball team which won the championship
Marque needed major surgery...and was diagnosed with a seperate major issue that will probably be with her for the rest of our natural lives
Marque, John, Reagan, and I went to Mexico with our church several friends...and made friends with some amazing missionaries that the earth isn't worthy of (Hebrews 11:38)
went to HAWAII on an amazing vacation/celebration for Natalie's wedding (Marque's sister)
dealt with the baseball craziness of John being on a competitive team, and Reagan being on a city champion baseball team that went undefeated...both won neat indivdual awards too
we moved. PRAISE GOD
I left our church with their blessing to.....
start a new non-profit ministry which is tantamount to starting a small business
endured Macye breaking her arm and then knocking out some teeth...all self inflicted
quit teaching at JBU at least temporarily
continuing to build a support team to allow the ministry to launch and grow
My beloved Chicago Bears are in the Super Bowl...pinch me
and am back again to having to make a decision about whether or not to do Ph.D. work starting this summer

And that's just the highlights off the top of my head.

To PhD, or not to PhD...that is the question

2006-03-03T17:26:00.000-06:00

I’ve been slowly applying for entrance into school again. I went to Louisville for 24 hours to formally interview at The Southern Baptist Seminary for their Ph.D. program in the school of Leadership and Ministry (we would NOT have to move there if I decide to do it, I would only be on campus for 2 weeks, 2x per year, for 4 years and would do the rest online in a 12 person cohort). It was an interesting experience.

FORMAL STUFF:

I had to complete an essay during a timed writing format. The bad thing going into this was that my time was very limited in research preparing for the essay. It has been a difficult past couple weeks with work and health issues at home (yes I’m making excuses, but they are legit). My sense was that I am a rusty paper writer! It looked more like a sermon than a research document I’m afraid.
The next morning I had a formal interview that went fairly well. Just a 20 minute sit-down and “get to know ya” session with one of the faculty. I usually do well in these types of situations, and the representative actually commented positively on my ability to articulate.

INFORMAL STUFF:

The campus is pretty and fairly well laid out. Lots of pretty red brick buildings. If you like steeples, this is the place for you!
They have a decent workout facility.
They have a nice hotel ON CAMPUS.
Overall though, the campus feels stiff, and the buildings seem to have had multiple facelifts that are showing considerable wear.
The classrooms are bit behind in educational technology. This surprised me, as I currently teach part-time at John Brown University, and they have far better educational facilities that I’ve grown accustomed to. When I see an overhead projector in a classroom instead of a video projector, that is a flag. I’m a bit of a snob too…I expect wireless capability in all classrooms…and they just aren’t there yet.
There are many conservative people there (not talking politics here if you get my drift). Sometimes egghead types lack a bit of…color? Personality? I don’t mean to be negative, but there is certainly that blandness that exists when you get to this level of education. However I think that will exist regardless of where I eventually do a Ph.D. These just happened to be really conservative Baptists (you are probably thinking, “You’re shocked at this?”).

WHAT I LEARNED:

If I decide to not enter this program (assuming they would even want me despite my mediocre essay), I have learned that I need to really step up my expertise in research methods and/or statistics before I were to apply again to any Ph.D. program.
If I do enter sooner than later, I will need to do some hard work on bringing up my level of research capability. I will mock myself and call it remedial research! ;)
IF THEY INVITED ME TODAY, WOULD I GO? I really don’t know. I would need confirmation from the Lord, and my wife. Their desire for me to “commit” might not work for our schedule with Marque’s health stuff being unresolved. There are a lot of positives and some potential negatives about moving forward. My personal drive says GO. But personal drive is not always born of wisdom, so I really need some new strong affirmations to do it. My logical side says maybe I should wait past Marque’s current season of life and her health issues. So…I am truly torn 50/50, and kind of hoping that they will tell me I’m NOT invited this time around if God would have me wait a bit longer. Even writing this blog helps me to process my thoughts and feelings out. My hunch is that I won’t be doing it, but I’m not ready to make that decision formally yet.
If I don’t do it, I could apply again for next year, or even look more seriously at other schools. I know a lot more about what to look for now, and am really glad God has led me through this process.